Another Heart Calls
by MiDoRi-KoKoRo
Summary: Edward and Bella meet and immediately sparks fly. Problem is, they are both in relationships already! Will they ignore the way they feel for each other or give in and let their love unfold? Dripping with Lemon juice. All human.
1. Sparks

**A/N So this is a new story that I'm going to be working on. Just a fun little idea that I've been playing so I thought I'd have a go at it. As any of any of my previous readers know my stuff is based heavily off of music so i have a theme with this one...... Hope everyone enjoys!**

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****Sparks**

_Yeah I saw sparks….Yeah I saw sparks…..And I saw sparks……Yeah I saw sparks -_

_Sparks by Coldplay_

**EPoV**

The screeching of the alarm clock startled me awake at 7:30 and as I blindly fumbled for the snooze button, my girlfriend Tanya, managed to wedge herself between me and my mattress.

"It's way too early for that," I grumbled into the pillow, but it was too late. She had already started to plant sloppy wet kisses along my collarbone and gyrating her hips against me.

"Come on Eddie. We'll make it a quickie if you want." Tanya's hand swiftly came down to my backside and she squeezed, pulling me into her. Little Edward, of course had a mind of his own and upon realizing there was nothing between him and Tanya's wet opening besides the thin material of my boxers, decided he was going to give her his full attention. I caved, pulling back to release him and allowing her to move up to my eye level. With a grunt I pushed into her and she cried out unnecessarily loud in my ear. It was early and I was cranky so after a few thrusts I decided to stifle her overly dramatic moaning with my mouth. I probed her mouth with my tongue in synchronization with my hips but pulled back in disgust moments later from the rancid taste in her mouth.

"What time did you get in last night?" I asked, flipping on the lights and rolling off her.

"Are you seriously stopping to ask me that, Edward?" She stared at me incredulously and then angrily as I climbed out of the bed.

"Obviously. Now answer the question. What time did you come home?"

"I don't know. Four maybe Five." I took a good look at her then, her hair still stiff on one side from the ridiculous amount of hairspray she uses, her cheeks flushed with a smear of hooker red lipstick smeared across them, and her eyes…bloodshot and pupils dilated so big you could fall into them.

"What was it this time?"

"Ugh…you're not my father you know."

"Thank God for that. What did you take?"

"Fine. I had a lot to drink. And some E…one or two lines of coke…I don't remember."

I pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration, shaking my head and then thoroughly disgusted, I turned away from her and headed out of the room. Ever since she dropped out of college she had been on a downward spiral. She spent all of her free time and all of my money hanging out with "The Sisters", drinking, partying, and lately she had gotten into party drugs. She was nothing like the beautiful, smart, and innocent girl I had fallen in love with and lost my virginity to in the back of my mother's Denali 5 years before.

"You're unbelievable."

"Yea well at least I'm honest."

"Honestly a mess. You're right. You are."

I slammed the bedroom door behind me and headed towards the bathroom, stepping over the passed out sisters on my living floor. The hot water in the shower washed my anger down the drain leaving me with a feeling of hopelessness. I couldn't help but take Tanya's descent into the shitter as a personal failure.

Where had I gone wrong?

As I inspected my reflection in the mirror I wondered if my studies were the cause of our falling out. It was no big secret that we barely spent time together anymore, but pre-med is no walk in the park and if I ever expected to be as good of a doctor as my father was, I was going to have to work hard. Besides it was her idea for me to become a doctor anyway. Still I made the conscious decision to make more of an effort for her. She had stuck by me through much worse. It was the least I could do.

When I emerged from the bathroom, "The Sisters" were no longer on the floor and I hoped that they had gone home.

"Hey Hun, listen I'm sorry I got so upset with-" , walking back into the bedroom, the three of them were now spooning each other in my bed. Kate, the one I hated the most was clearly drooling on my pillow.

"Tanya?"

"What Edward? I'm trying to sleep," she barked at me, glaring at me over Irina's shoulder.

"I was just trying to apologize for getting so upset with you. Be dressed when I get home from class tonight…I want to take you some place nice."

Tanya's eyes lit up for a moment, a hint of the girl I used to love still there and smiled. "Sure thing Eddie."

I leaned over the bed, avoiding her mouth and kissing her forehead, trying to hold my breath to keep the cigarette and vomit smell from burning my nostrils.

"Love you babe."

"Yea..me too."

As I grabbed clothes from my closet I tried to ignore the nagging feeling that lately saying that felt like a blatant lie. I dressed quickly, eager to get outside and out of the toxic atmosphere which had become my home and sped off towards the campus. It was a slightly overcast day, the sun just beginning to peak out from behind the clouds and as I was climbing out of my car, I admired the way that tiniest bit of sunlight seemed to brighten up the whole sky.

"Come on slow poke. I'm starving!"

Alice, my tiny pixie-like sister, popped up in front of me and slammed my car door shocking me out of my reverie.

"Oh! Don't sneak up on me like that you little gnat!"

"Yeah Yeah whatever Edward. Everyone is inside already. We got you your usual if that's okay. I'm starving and couldn't wait any longer." I threw my arm around her shoulder laughing as we walked towards the diner across the street from my university to meet up with the rest of our group. Alice slid into the seat next to her fiancé Jasper, kissing his cheek and then stole his orange juice. Oddly enough his twin sister Rosalie was also engaged to my brother Emmett who was at the moment feeding her strawberries.

"Finally you're here man. What took you so long? Morning hump on the train wreck," Emmett asked turning to me.

"You're not funny Em."

"I wasn't trying to be." I sneered at him and then we both laughed followed by punching each other in the shoulder for good sport.

The food came moments later and we all chatted while stuffing our faces. A year ago, Tanya would have been sitting right here with us but I tried not to dwell on that.

"So we finally set a date for the wedding guys," Alice chirped in between bites of her strawberry waffles. "Its going to be February 7th." Alice and Jasper looked at each other for a moment, love and adoration brimming over in their eyes.

"But Allie, that's only a month away. How are you going to plan a wedding in a month?" Rosalie tried to appear concerned but I knew her too well. She was upset that Alice was getting married before her. Alice's gaze flickered to me from across the table, a devilish little smile playing in the corners from her mouth and I smiled back…she knew it just as well as I did.

"Well Rose, I know you and Emmett were planning for a summer wedding and I didn't want to steal any of your limelight. We didn't want to be any competition for your wedding of the year so we decided to just do an intimate little ceremony. 7 days before the anniversary of our…well everything really."

Somehow, as if the stars didn't align for them enough as it was, 7 years ago they had met on Valentine's day, exactly a year later they had finally gotten together and had their first kiss, exactly a year after that they had sex for the first time, 3 years later Jasper gave her a promise ring, and a year later they were officially engaged. It was weird yes…but at the same time sickeningly romantic.

"Oh well that's great then. Mom and Dad will be happy they don't have to pay for two giant weddings in the same year," Emmett said stuffing French toast in his mouth.

Rosalie and Jasper had basically been adopted by our family when their parents died in a car crash their senior year of high school. Although they lived just out of town with their god mother Maria, they stayed at our house most of the time so they could stay in school and my parents even offered to foot the bill of Emmett's and Rosalie's wedding.

"Well, the money wasn't the important part. We just don't see the need for a big to do. We want the wedding to be about our love for each other and that's it. Oh and Edward, Jasper and I would be would be honored if you would sing for our first dance." I rolled my eyes at her. She knew my music had become a sore spot for me.

"Please little brother." Alice put her hand on my arm, forcing me to look into her big puppy dog eyes. No one could resist her pleading look.

"Fine Alice…Jasper…I'd love to. But consider that my gift to you." Alice smiled and the nudged Jasper with her elbow.

"We were hoping for a jet ski but your serenading will do." She leaned over pecking me on the forehead and then threw her napkin on the table. "I've got to go. I'm going to be late for work. I've got so much to do today but I want you guys to be by the house at 7 tonight. We have to start going over wedding stuff and I want you guys to meet my other bridesmaid." Alice winked at me and I looked up at her confused when she said this. Her and Jasper shuffled off from the table and then the rest of us separated.

I coasted through the rest of the day not realizing that this seemingly unspectacular day was about to change my life. Tanya was asleep on the couch when I got home, her strawberry blond hair swept across her face and the remote dangling from her hand. I swept her hair back, kissing her cheek and she stirred awake.

"Hmmm good you're home. I'm starved. Where are we going." I sat on the edge of the couch, pulling her up and she wrapped her arms around my neck, nuzzling me.

"We've got to stop by Allie's first. They set a date and she wants to talk about wedding stuff but we won't stay long. I thought we'd go La Bella Italia?"

Tanya groaned and laid back down, rolling away from me. "I hate that place."

"You haven't even been there yet, how can you hate it?"

"It sounds stupid. Can't we just go to Fridays or something; you know where they have normal food." She waved her hand dismissively at me and I had to swallow back a surge of irritation.

"Fine. Excuse me for trying to treat you to something nice."

"If you want to treat me to something nice how about an engagement ring of my own."

I rolled my eyes and walked into the bedroom, changing into a pair of blue jeans, a black oxford shirt and boots. Tanya followed me into the bedroom and flopped on the edge of the bed, bringing her heels up on the frame and spreading her legs.

"We can be late to Alice's right? Right now you look dish in those jeans and I really want you to finish what you started this morning." Tanya gave me a look that was seductive enough to take down a monk and I stalked over to her, pressing my mouth to hers as she laid back on the bed. She hitched her thighs up on my waist and just as I was fumbling with her belt buckle my phone started vibrating in my pocket followed by Karen O's blaring voice.

"What is it Alice?" I grumbled into phone.

"Just wanted to know if you were going to stay for dinner. Geez don't bite my head off."

"No. We're going out."

"Okay, that's fine but don't be late okay. You know how I hate it when things don't go according to plan. One little change could send the whole night to ruin…so get your butt over here." I pressed the end button on the phone sticking back in my pocket, standing up and pulling Tanya with me.

"Let's just go. We'll finish this when we get home." Tanya pulled me in for a kiss and bit my lower lip before I slapped her butt and sent her out the door.

When we got to the Alice's, everyone except for the other bridesmaid was there. Alice had her large wedding planner book spread on the living room table and everyone was crowded around it as she went down the list of everyone's jobs.

"Ah finally you two are here. Edward you're going to be second groomsman you'll be walking down the aisle with Bella." Just as she spoke the doorbell rang. I turned around to answer it just as Tanya was saying "Who the hell is Bella?" and Alice was yelling "It's open". Tanya's question was answered.

There was the sound of the door opening, followed by shoes skidding across the floor, and then a head full of long brown hair connected to a falling body landed in my arms. This small slender body that seemed to fit perfectly in my arms was Bella. She stiffened as I help her right herself and slowly lifted her face to mine. Her cheeks were flushed a deep red from embarrassment, her pouty lips parted and slightly wet, but it was her eyes that caught me. Her deep brown eyes were opened wide with shock and she stared at me for a moment, neither one of us moving, just standing there and in that moment it was as if we were the only two people in the world. Her small hands gripped onto my wrist and I felt a surge of longing shoot electrically through my body.

"Um, sorry, Hi.. I'm um… I'm Isa- I'm Bella." Her voice was like music to my ears and I unconsciously tightened my grip on her. Had it not been for Tanya clearing her throat I probably would have kissed her.

"Uh, yea… sorry. I'm Edward. Alice's brother."

"Oh, yea…the uh…musician right."

"Med –student."

"Oh…I thought she said…"  
"I was a music student. Now I'm pre-med."

"Oh."

Bella's face reddened and I fought the urge to cover her cheeks with my hands and press my lips to hers.

"Edward, I think she's on her feet now. You can let her go!" Tanya came over and ripped my arm away and my body went slightly limp from the loss of Bella's touch.

"Oh yea, sorry. Are you okay?"

Bella's hair fell like a curtain against her face separating us as she turned her face away from me.

"Yea. I'm fine. Thanks for the catch."

Alice, seeing the jealous look on Tanya's face, took the opportunity to brighten the mood back up in the room and jumped across the table pulling Bella into a hug. Never in all of my life had I ever been jealous of my sister, but in that moment I wanted nothing more than to be her. She introduced her to everyone and then sat her on the couch, squeezing in between her and Jasper. She went through the jobs that she wanted everyone to do, but I was barely listening. I couldn't take my eyes off of Bella's face, and it was clear she was having a hard time keeping her eyes off me although I couldn't tell if it was just because I was staring at her.

Alice asked her if she could find a nice passage from "you know, one of those books you're always carting around with you" and she smiled a small delicate smile, but nevertheless it was the most beautiful smile I had ever had the pleasure of looking at. Her eyes flickered to mine for a moment, the lights into room dancing in them, the smile still on her lips and I found myself smiling back.

An hour later Bella left following Emmett and Rose out of the house. Tanya snatched my keys, leaving in a fury to start the car and Alice walked me to the door looking down the hall after her.

"She's lovely isn't she?"

"Tanya's always been beautiful." Alice's smile lit up her face as she squeezed my hands.

"You know that's not who I'm talking about you nutter."

"Oh… yea…uh-

Alice covered my mouth with her hand and pulled me down to kiss my cheek.

"Scram. I'm wiped out. By the way…she has a boyfriend…so don't get any ideas there mate." She closed the door in my face and I could hear her laughing on the other side of it even as I got down the hall.

Tanya didn't speak to me on the ride to Fridays. She barely said a word during dinner which was just as well with me. My mind was stupidly swimming with thoughts of Bella. I had only been around her for about two hours but she had sparked something inside of me that I hadn't felt in a very long time, if ever. It wasn't just that she was breathtakingly beautiful, but she was funny as well, and I could tell…even in the short time that I had spent neat her, just how open and honest she was. She positively glowed though it didn't seem that she knew it and I could tell that she loved my sister; all of her emotions were so clear to see in her beautiful brown eyes and when she looked at me…there was definitely something there.

Tanya didn't speak to me until we got home and she didn't speak, so much as jump on me and demand that I take my clothes off. With the strength of a man she pushed me onto the couch, biting at my lips and clawing at my clothes. I retuned her fervor after remembering the fact that Bella was in a relationship anyway, and ripped the shirt over Tanya's head. She pressed her breasts into my face and I ran my lips across them as she squirmed out of her pants.

"Bedroom!" I barked at her, slapping her firm ass and she squealed and hopped off my lap, running for the bed. I followed her, leaving a trail of clothes behind me and threw myself onto her. Tanya fisted my hairs as she ran her tongue along my neck and I made quick work of pulling her bra off. Our bodies slammed together and I groaned as she wrapped her legs around my waist and I slid with ease into her.

"Yes…Yes..Oh Yes… Fuck me Eddie! Fuck me… just like that!"

I thrust into her over and over, flipping her this way and that, trying to find a good position but no matter what I did nothing felt right. She must have sensed this because she pushed me onto my back and gave me a seething look before she started slamming herself on to me. Tanya knew how to use her body and despite my detachment I found myself racing towards climax.

I pushed Tanya up, taking a moment to admire her body, just as she arched her back and her walls squeezed the life out of my cock. I grabbed her hips, slamming on down my lap and squeezed my eyes shut as I came and filled her with my little me's. Tanya collapsed spent against me, her sweaty body sliding against mine as she slid to my side and I cradle her in my arms all of a sudden feeling very much in love. I kissed her forehead and she snuggled against me.

"You remember that day…how I refused to leave your side Edward. It's always been me and you against the world…nothing's ever come between us."

"I know…I know." Tanya squeezed me sleepily, her lips brushing my chest.

"Who the hell does your sister think she is having you walk down the aisle with someone else? I should be in her bridal party. We're practically family."

"Things would have been uneven then; there would be no one to walk with Bella."

"What about Jasper's god brother, Demetrii? He's a good-looking guy." I couldn't stop the reflexive surge of rage that coursed through me whenever anyone said his name. Every time the guy came around we got into a fist fight and it would be a miracle if it didn't happen again at the wedding.

"Her wedding…her wedding party. You'll still be sitting with the family so don't worry about it."

My words fell on deaf ears though Tanya had fallen asleep, her naked breasts rubbed against my chest as she fidgeted in her sleep and I forced myself to follow her into somnolence before little Edward could wake up again.

That night, my dreams were a re-enactment of the romp that Tanya and I had had but with one difference, when I gazed up at the body riding me, it wasn't the body of my girlfriend. It was a smaller less rigid body and it wasn't strawberry blond hair cascading across the soft shoulders, but soft brown curls that came sweeping across my face as Bella's lips were slowly coming down toward mine. Our bodies swayed together and as my dream Bella climaxed her mouth came down to my ear and she breathed into it "I love you."

I woke up in a cold sweat before my alarm went off….my hand full of me…and I knew I was in trouble.

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**A/N So....yea...there's the first chapter...what do you think? Like my other story this one is going to flip back and forth between Edward and Bella's point of veiw but not as regularly... I'm just going with the flow on this one.**

**Who's ready for "Remember Me"? I know I am. I'm also going to be checking out K. Stewarts new movie "The Yellow Handkerchief" this weekend. I'll let you know how it is.**

**Leave Love....or hate if you must.  
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	2. I Caught Myself

**A/N I'm trying to get this story more attention so I'm posting another chapter now. **

**Thank you to everyone who's given my story a chance so far...it greatly appreciated.**

**Now go...enjoy!**

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****I Caught Myself**

_Now when I caught myself…I had to stop myself…from saying that…I should've never thought  
Now when I caught myself…I had to stop myself…from saying that I should've never thought  
Of you….  
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_**I Caught Myself- Paramore**  
_

**BPoV**

I climbed the stairs of my apartment building feeling worn out yet oddly alive at the same time. My cheeks were still hot and when I caught my reflection in the hall mirror; I was pleasantly surprised to see that I was still smiling.

"What are you cheesing about?" Jacob stood in the doorway, his arms crossed as he looked me over, inspecting my very red face.

"I had a good time at Alice's." I touched his arm and he leaned down so I could kiss his cheek.

"How much fun could planning a wedding possibly be?" I shrugged my shoulders still smiling.

"Anything can be fun in good company. How was your day?"

"It was a day. I went over to my dads and worked on the rabbit a little bit. It should be back on the road soon."

I walked into the living and had the urge to turn and walk right back out of the house. There were empty Chinese food containers, magazines, and clothes all over the coffee table. Jacob's shoes were in the middle of the floor along with his coat and keys and there were muddy footprints on the carpet.

"Couldn't you have cleaned up a little bit before I got home?"

"Sorry, I was tired. I have been working all day."

"Yea, well I had class and work and wedding planning to do. I'm going to have a shower and then I'm going to bed. Clean this place up." I didn't bother waiting for his response. I stormed off to the bathroom, and shed my clothes on the floor before turning the water all the way on. Jacob's music blared from the other room and felt a twinge of irritation because now he was going to go on a guilty cleaning spree and probably make me dinner too.

The hot water washed away my frustration and cleared my head enough for me to recap my very hectic day. Work had been killer, my math class was killer, and then there was my extremely embarrassing entrance into Alice's living room full of family I had never met. The only saving grace was her strikingly gorgeous brother who caught me in his arms as if he were waiting for me to fall. He had the most beautiful, crystal green eyes I had ever seen in my life.

He also had probably felt me ogling him all night which explained why he kept looking at me the way he did. Maybe he was dreading have to walk with me and every time he smiled that ridiculously sexy half smile at me, he was imagining me falling first in the middle of the aisle. Still, the thought of that smile turned my knees to jelly and at the moment I could barely stand. I stepped out of the shower for fear that I would fall over and crack my skull on the porcelain tub, and sat on the edge of it trying to contain myself. I felt silly thinking of Alice's brother that way but he was hands down the most gorgeous man I ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on.

Jacob poked his head in the bathroom and I shook, trying to rid myself of my lascivious thoughts.  
"You done in here, I wanted to get some water to clean the floors?"

I looked into Jacob's handsome face and warm brown eyes. The same brown eyes I had been looking into since I was kid. It wasn't until 4 years ago that we realized we really loved each other but for the past 6 months those lovely brown eyes had a distant look in them that scared me.  
"Yea, I'm just about done. Let me just-

Jacob looked over my barely covered body and met my eyes with a mischievous look in his, grinning from ear to ear. That look was enough for me. I bit into my bottom lip as he closed the space between us and pulled me into his arms. He clutched my backside pulling me flush with his body before spinning and pressing my back against the wall. I moaned, banging my head against the wall when he reached underneath my towel, his warm hands sliding between my thighs. His mouth roughly found mine, and we kissed and inpassionate dirty kiss that sent my senses into shock.

Despite our relation_shit_, Jacob was a fantastic lover and when I reached down to unbuckle his pants I felt like I was about to win a prize. Jacob groaned in my ear when I wrapped my hand around his albeit not very long but thick cock. He swung me away from the wall and fumbled for the door while our faces were still attached. Unfortunately for me, the fact that his pants were around his ankles slipped his mind and we fell to the floor in the middle of the hallway.

Both of us burst into teary laughs as Jacob positioned himself between my legs and smile down at me with that ear to ear smile that I loved so much.

"Love me?" he asked.  
"Like always. Love me?"  
"You know it."  
My cries off pleasure were muffled by Jacob's mouth covering in mine. His quick short thrusts were followed by deep long ones and it wasn't long before I felt the heat rising from my toes. I pushed him up so that I was on top and rode out my waves of orgasm. While my body was still shaking, Jacob grunted, flipping me onto my back and thrust into me hard and fast. My hip bones ached but I held out and when his body stiffened and moments later he collapsed onto me, we both let out a sigh of relief.

We lay there on the hallway floor for a few minutes, coming down off of our orgasmic high and then Jacob pushed off me pulling me up with him.  
"Thanks. I need that."

"Stop thanking me for sex Jacob. I'm your girlfriend. Next you'll be wanting to high-five afterwards."

"Only if it's a really good one." He smirked and held up his hand, and I couldn't help but laugh at his silliness as I slapped his hand with mine. He followed me back into the shower and then into the bedroom to change and as I dressed for bed we talked about Alice's wedding.

"It was nice to finally meet Alice's family. They are all really close. They each come from across town every morning and have breakfast together and go home to their parents every other weekend. It's really nice."

"Yea, speaking of family, Charlie called for you today. He wants to know if we were coming down this weekend for Sue's birthday dinner."

"Not if Leah is gonna be there."

"Come on Leah's not so bad." He winked at me setting my stomach aflutter with anxiety and pulled his shirt over his head. "Besides, she is your stepsister so… she isn't going anywhere."

"No where but hell," I mumbled under my breath. Even though Jacob and Leah had grown on the reservation together, he was _my _boyfriend. It would have been nice if he defended me the way he did her.

"She's just bitter about me and her mom going on with the pale-faces," he teased and I scowled at him climbing into bed. Jacob came over to my side of the bed and planted a wet kiss on my forehead.  
"I'm going to meet up with Quil and Embry for a little while. Don't wait up for me."  
"But it's already 11."  
"And your point is?"  
"Where could you possibly be going at 11 at night?"  
"No where, anywhere, everywhere. Embry's on the pull again and he needs his wingmen babe. I'm just being a good friend."  
"Yea, alright. You just make sure Embry is the only one on the pull tonight. I don't want anymore frantic 2 a.m. calls from Claire that Quil came home reeking of perfume." Jacob laughed, leaning over to kiss me again and pressed his forehead to mine.  
"Sure thing Bells. I'll keep him on a choke chain if I have to."

I snuggled down into the bed and Jacob pulled the covers over me and kissed me one last time. "See you when you wake up," and then he clicked off the lights and shut the door.

But I didn't see him when I woke up. I sleepily reached over to cuddle him in the morning and got only air. Groggily I climbed of bed and walked into the living room, thinking he had crashed on the couch so he didn't wake me but he wasn't there either.

Wonderful start to my day.

As if it could have gone any other way, the rest of my day was complete rubbish. Nothing went right at the publisher's office I was interning at, my evening class was canceled but of course I didn't know until I got there, and to make matter worse- Jacob hadn't called or answered any of my calls all day. Nor had he shown up for work. If I hadn't of been so brassed-off I would have been worried. But such was my seething rage that when I walked into the house to find him cleaning the mud stains off the carpet, I wasn't relieved- I was livid.

"Hey sorry about not calling all day. I got really hammered and passed out at Quil's and my battery was dead so I couldn't call."

The anger sharks were swimming in my head and I marched across the room, kicked the bucket over, and sent water splashing all over him. He looked at me in shock, holding his hands up helplessly.

"Bella what the hell?"  
"You're a jerk,' I seethed and then stormed off towards the bedroom, slamming the door. "By the way, Quil has a landline and a mobile. You could have called!"  
I threw myself on the bed, finally allowing myself to cry out my frustrations and ended up crying myself to sleep.

The sound of my phone buzzing on the nightstand woke me up and I reached for it, not bothering to see who it was.  
"I'm sorry lovey, did I wake you?"  
"Yea, but its okay. I had to get up anyway. What's up Alice?"  
"Oh, nothing. I'm just heading to my brothers to talk about some wedding stuff and wanted to see if I could pick you up."

Immediately -and startlingly to me- I perked up, wiping the sleep from my eyes and ran a hand through my tangled hair as if Edward were standing in front of me.  
"Oh, you're going to Edwards?"  
"Noooo…I'm going to Emmett's. Rosalie is my maid of honor remember?"  
"Oh, yea…right…makes sense."  
"So can you come or are you busy?"  
"No, swing by. I'd be happy to get out the house for a while." Alice was silent on the other end but then heard the blaring of horns and knew she had just pulled some crazy stunt in the middle of the road.  
"I'll be there in 15 and you can tell me all about it."

Some how Alice always knew when something was wrong or when something was going to be wrong. In the two years that I had known her, she had become my best female friend next to my mom and Angela from back home and I was honored that she had asked me to be in her wedding. A blush crept onto my face when I thought about who I'd be stumbling down the aisle with and then guilt washed through me as I passed Jacob lounging on the couch when I headed for the door. He didn't ask me where I was going and when I turned to say goodbye he kept his eyes glued to the TV. I slammed the door and waited for Alice in the cold.

"What did the dog do this time?" She cooed as I climbed into the car.  
"I don't even want to get into it. Your stuff is more important. So…what are we going over tonight."  
"Measurements for you and Rose's dresses and I want you guys to look at some material swatches so I can start designing."  
"Wouldn't it be easier to go a dress store considering the limited time," I mumbled staring out the window. Secretly I was dreading have to wear the same dress as her soon to be sister in law. Rosalie was stunningly beautiful in the super-model way. Next to her I'd look the troll under the bridge.

"Oh please, you expect me to let my bridesmaids where something off the rack? I know I said I wanted a simple wedding but not simple." Alice's musical laughter lifted my sprits and I laughed with her as we parked in the driveway of Rosalie and Emmett's condo. There was a silver Volvo in front of us and Alice shrugged her shoulders getting out of the car.

"I guess he's here anyway."

My heart pounded in my throat as I followed Alice up the walkway. She ran the doorbell once and then let herself in with a key. Music was playing and I could here everyone laughing in the other room. Jasper appeared out of no where, sweeping Alice off her feet and kissed her.

"Hey Bella," he said once their faces detached. "Let me take your coat." He reached for it but Rose gracefully snatched it.

"Take your little pixie bride and go sit please." They smiled at each other, carbon copies of these malicious little grins and then leaned in staring each other down.

"You might as well hang up your own coat Bella. These twin staring contests could last all night." I craned my neck around the two of them to see Emmett smiling at me and then my breath caught in my throat when Edward appeared behind him.

"Twenty bucks Rose knees him in the balls again to win." His voice was smooth like strawberry butter, fixing me in such a trance that I didn't even notice Jasper bent over, red in the face, and clutching himself in front of me.

"Rose! I plan on using those you know," Alice squealed laughingly and then she bent over and kissed Jasper's cheek.  
"We'll make sure to get you a cup for next time babe."

For the first hour we sat in the living room have daiquiris, beer, and pizza and just talking. Having never experienced such family closeness I expected to feel out of place with them but my feelings were quite the contrary. I found myself laughing along with all of their jokes and even developed a teasing relationship with Emmett. I learned a lot about them and just how close they really were. Rosalie spoke constantly of Edward's girlfriend. This at least helped to keep my ogling of him at the bare minimum and after Rose joked that they'd probably end up married before her I swallowed the stupid butterflies that were fluttering around in my stomach. Hiding my disappoint would be easier if I ignored that fact that it was there and besides…I had Jacob.

Finally Alice dragged me and Rose into Rose's closet that was the size of a small bedroom upstairs and went all business.  
"Okay, Bella I need all of your measurements so strip."

"What!" my eyes bulged out of my head and I wrapped my arms protectively around myself.

"You heard me. Take your clothes off."

"Can't you take them with my clothes on?" I hated being undressed in front if other people. I knew Jacob my whole life and it had been a whole year after we started sleeping together that I let him see me completely naked and here she was expecting me to take my clothes off in front of her drop dead gorgeous sister whom I'd only met the day before.

"Not if I want accurate measurements. Come on, we're all girls here. Don't be shy."

I growled under my breath and began unbuttoning my pants trying to remember what kind of underwear I had put on that morning. Thankfully I had put on a pair of very non embarrassing red bikinis and it was by the graced of god that my bra actually matched. Alice and Rose both whistled and my face was instantly as red as my underwear.

"Wow Bella, you've got a hot little body under all those clothes," Alice said wrapping a tape measurer around my chest.  
"And a descent rack, Bella, you should show it off more," Rosalie chimed in. Soon she had music playing and both she and Alice had made trips back to the kitchen to re-fill our glasses. The alcohol in the daiquiris had made us all hot so Rose gave each of us silk robes and we sprawled drunkenly out on her floor talking about everything under the sun.

"I can't believe I'm actually getting married in 28 days."

"Yea, you're crazy to try and do it in such a short time." Rosalie rolled onto her stomach looked Alice dead in the eye but she just smiled.

"I know but if everybody just does what they're supposed to then I see things going according to plan."

"Ahhh, the bridezilla's coming out, run for your life Bella." Rosalie nudged me and we both laughed at Alice's pouty face.

"Come on guys…I'm not that bad am I?" She looked honestly worried so I squeezed her knee reassuringly.

"Of course not. Just your usual crazy self."

"Good then if you don't think I'm being pushy, you wont mind going down stairs to re-fill our glasses."

I shook my head, picking up my glasses and reached for my clothes.  
"Don't be silly Bella. You'll just end up taking them right back off. Kitchen is down stairs to the left but here, the floor gets really cold." Rose tossed a pair of fuzzy slippers at me and I slipped my feet into them.

I crept down the stairs really slowly, trying not to draw attention to myself. The robe barely came mid-thigh. It would be just like me to trip and end up in the middle of the hallway with my ass up in the hair. Luckily I made it down the stairs without incident but when I got into the kitchen I almost dropped the glasses…

Edward was half bent over in the fridge getting beer, his glorious ass pointing right in my direction. The waistband of his Calvin Klein underwear was peeking out and his shirt was slightly lifted exposing his creamy white and freckled skin. I stood frozen in place, practically drooling. My eyes followed him as he stood up and through his grey t-shirt I could see how perfectly sculpted his shoulders and back were. Hot lust ran through me, making my mouth water even more and I could feel myself getting wet between my tightly clenched thighs.

"Oh. Hi." The sound of the glass crashing to the ground and Edward's voice shocked my out of my fantasy trance and I quickly looked down at my own hands hoping that I hadn't dropped Rose's very expensive glass on the floor.

I hadn't.

Edward on the other hand stood in a sea of brown glass, beer and foam.

"Oh crap." He finally looked at the ground around him and I finally let out the breath that had been burning in my chest as I moved across the floor and bent to help him clean it up.

"Bella you really don't have to-  
"No it okay-

And then we looked up at the same time, a little to close and our foreheads banged into each other hard enough to send us reeling back on the floor right on our butts. For a second I forgot I wasn't wearing pants until I saw Edwards piercing green eyes glued between my legs. I pulled the robe down and his eyes flickered to mine – he was clearly- embarrassed- and then he scrambled to his feet and helped me up.

"Sorry…I'm sorry…I didn't meant to-  
"Um…It's okay. Let just clean up the mess before the floor gets all sticky."

I tried to ignore my pounding heart as we worked silently side-by-side to clean up a mess that I for once didn't make. We avoided making eye contact until we were done and he went back to the fridge for more beer. I stood in the middle of the kitchen helplessly looking around and the busted out laughing.

"What's so funny," he asked me with an incredulous look on his face.  
"Nothing. It's just that I've completely forgotten what I came down here for."

And cue the sexy half grin that almost stopped my heart.

"I think you came down to re-fill your glasses." He motioned towards the counter, the glasses, and the empty blender. "But it seems you ladies finished off the last batch."  
"Shame. I don't know how to make those. Do you?"

He nodded putting the beer back in the fridge and then as if it were the most normal thing in the world, he placed his hand flat on the small of my back and led me toward the counter. I watched as he poured ice and all the other daiquiri things in the blender and then turned it on without putting the top on it. Red crap started to fly out and I rushed forward shutting off.

I looked at him and we both laughed. It was pretty funny.

"I seem to be repeatedly making a fool of myself in front of you. You must think I'm really naff."

"No, maybe a little clumsy but that would be the pot calling the other pot a pot."

"You mean the pot calling the kettle black?"

"No I mean…maybe…you get what I'm trying to say."

He looked at me quizzically and them smiled that panty dropping half smile again. "Yes…I suppose I do."

We finished making the daiquiris in an amiable silence, both wearing these silly little grins as we eyed each other and waited for the next disaster to strike. Gratefully nothing happened and our little adventure came to an end.

"Would you like to do the honor's partner?" he asked jokingly, handing me the pitcher.

"No I think you better go ahead. That looks a bit heavy. I don't want to spill our hard work all over the floor with your beer."

He narrowed his eyes at me mockingly, filled the glasses and placed them on a tray. For a few moments we just stood there, looking at each other, neither of knowing what to say. The tension between us was thick and it seemed neither of us knew how to break it. Unconsciously, I found, we had taken a steps towards each other and it this point were so close I could feel and smell his appley breath on my face. He smelled delicious and I was starting to feel dizzy but something in my mind flashed DANGER and I turned away quickly, forcing myself to think of Jacob sitting at home waiting for me.

"Thank you." I muttered quickly and reached for the tray. From the corner of my eye I saw him shake his head quickly but then his eyes settled back on my face and I blushed, turning completely away from him.

"I lied to you by the way. I have no idea how to make these fruity girly drinks. Would you mind trying it first so my sister and Rose don't laugh at me?"

I nodded and just as I was about to pick up a glass he stopped me. His hand slowly came around my wrist and he pulled me around to face him and again I could not breathe. He stared intensely into my eyes and they seemed to smolder. My knees threatened to give out on me when he brought his other hand up, gently cupped my face and rubbed his thumb softly across my cheek.

He was looking into my face with such concentration, as if he were afraid to crush me and moved slowly. This gave me a chance to really take him in and he was truly beautiful, in a way that people shouldn't even be allowed to be. Even his slightly crooked nose was endearing and when I felt him thumb gently party my lips, my carnal instincts screamed for me to wrap my legs around this man and take him completely into me.

Instead I wrapped my tongue around his thumb inside my mouth and licked the sweet strawberry juice off it.

"Aye Edward what the hell is taking you so long?" Emmett's booming voice and thudding footsteps were coming on fast and we were both snapped to. He shoved the tray in my hands, blushing a full on blush and just as Emmett made it into the kitchen I was ducking underneath him into the hallway. I stumbled up the stairs, my heart racing a mile a minute, getting lost momentarily in the hall and then finally made it back to Rose's closet.

"What took you so long?"  
"The pitcher was empty so um…Edward made more and he spilled beer on the floor…so I uh…you know helped him clean it." I answered Alice as coolly as possible but as usual she saw right thorough me. Rose on the other hand just shrugged and reached for her glass. We immediately went into talking about the bachorlette party and putting stamps on envelopes until it was time to go home.

As I climbed into bed with Jacob that night, I guilty threw my arms around him, whispering into his ear that he was forgiven. He rolled over, spooning me and kissed the top head and I snuggled against hoping his earthy scent that had comforted me for so long would drown out my thoughts of Edward.

It didn't work.

That night I tossed and turned, dreaming of our bodies tangled in all sorts of positions I was to chicken-shit to even consider in real life and in all of them he looked at me so lovingly…so wantonly…as if he would burst into flames if we separated. In the morning I woke up on the far side of the bed, a sticky mess between my legs and I knew I was in sooooooo much trouble.

* * *

**A/N OOOOOOOOOOOOH, they are being naughtieeeeeeee. I'm telling.**

**Or you can tell....me...what you thought of this chapter.**

**Oh and by the way Twilight fans...in my search for eclipse movie related things...i came across...hold your breath....wait for it...wait for it....**

**A picture of...**

**"THE LEG HITCH"!!!!!!**

**And you all know exactly what leg hitch Im talking about....**

**If only it were me...I'd hitch my legs around Rob's shoulders and...well im sure you get the point...**

**Anyhoo....Leave love or hate( if you really see the need to)...I don't care what you say as long as its about me...the best of us can find happiness in misery...  
**


	3. The Chemicals between Us

**A/N Thanks to everyone who's been giving this story a chance...i appreciate your support and hope that you stick with me on this one**

* * *

**The Chemicals between Us**

_The chemicals between us…The walls that lie between us  
Lying in this bed… The chemicals displace  
There is no lonelier state…Than lying in this bed  
__**The Chemicals between Us- Bush**_

**EPoV**

Everyone partakes in harmless flirting every once in a while and that's all it was…harmless…flirting. At least that's what I told myself the whole ride home. However I couldn't deny how my heart pounded the whole time I was with her or the overwhelming feeling I had just to touch her and feel that she was…real. It occurred to me that I had never felt that way about anyone in my entire life and this new revelation brought on a whole new wave of guilt because you see:  
Edward Cullen does not cheat.

I repeated my manta to myself all the way up the stairs, swallowing the memories of Bella's warm wet mouth around my finger and how it made me practically crazy with want just to kiss her. I forced myself not to think about how I badly I wanted to get to know her…who she was…and why on earth I had this nagging feeling that if I wasn't careful I would fall madly in love with her. When I walked into my apartment Tanya was sitting on the couch, her strawberry blond hair piled in a loose bun on top of her head, and her chin resting on her knees as she watched TV. I watched her from the doorway for a moment and when she realized I was there and smiled the knots in my stomach uncoiled. I did love her…and I wouldn't be a douche and do anything to hurt her. Harmless flirting…that's all it was.

"Eddie, baby you're home!" Tanya reached out for me and I went to her….took her in my arms… and pressed my lips to hers. I kissed her hard pushing her head back against the couch and went down on my knees in front of her, resting between her legs. I trailed kisses from down her neck and then buried my face between her breasts.  
"Well…somebody must have missed me today?"  
"Yes, I did." Tanya ran her fingers through my hair sending shivers down my spine and I leaned into her more, inhaling her scent as I caressed her thighs.  
"Well I missed you too Eddie."

I ignored the urge to cringe, instead lifting her shirt over her head and pressing my lips to her flat stomach. "Come to bed with me?" I murmured into her skin. In that moment I wanted nothing more than to make love to my girlfriend and hopefully shoot my irrational feelings out of me with my spunk, but she pulled my head up by my hair so I could see her face and shook her head no.

"I would Eddie but I just got out of the shower and don't want to get all dirty again. Why don't we just sit here and watch TV." She patted the couch beside her giving me an innocent little smile. A little too innocent. I slid next to her and kicked off my shoes, watching from the corner of my eye. Her posture was a little too rigid and she kept her face towards the TV so I couldn't see her. I leaned back and pulled her shoulder so that she would lean against me but she turned quickly, moving from underneath my hand.

"What did Alice have you doing today?" Turning back to the TV she leaned forward and grabbed her glass off the coffee table when I tried again. It could have just been my paranoia but it was as if she all of a sudden didn't want me touching her.

"Alice had us going over tuxes and shoes and then Jasper and I went through some song ideas."

"Oh? Song ideas for what?"

"Alice wants me to play for their first dance. I told her I would do it…as my gift."

Tanya jumped up off the couch, turning to me with anger flashing in her eyes and I knew she was about to explode. "Is she out of her mind? Are we going to have to go through this again?" she yelled throwing up her hands.

"Calm down. Go through what? "

"The whole _I want to be a musician _thing. You promised you wouldn't play anymore. You promised _me _you would let that go."

A static irritation flushed through me and I pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to contain myself so I wouldn't yell. "Tanya," I said as calmly as possible, "It's my sisters wedding. If she wants me to play for her I'm going to play. One song isn't going to hurt anyone."

"No, one song wont…but one will turn into two, three, four, five. The next thing I know we'll be right back where we were two years ago before I pulled your head out of your ass." Tanya pointed her long red finger nail and I turned my face away. I absolutely hated it when she put her fingers in my face.

"No one said I was going to go back on my word Tanya. It's one goddamn song. Get off it."

I swatted her finger from my face, stalked into the kitchen, and stood in the freezer pretending to look for food but really I was cooling myself off. Tanya came up behind me and curling her arms under my shoulders and pressed her chest to my back.  
"Eddie…baby don't be mad at me. I know you. You'll pick up that guitar or sit at that piano and start doubting everything I've tried to build for us. I know that what's best for us is for you to become a doctor like you father. Look at Rose and Emmett. Emmett has a great job as an athletic physical therapist and they have everything they want. Don't you want that for us…for our future?"

Tanya's logic started running through my mind and I fought back the bitter taste of resentment and nodded my head that she was right.

"You know I'm right Edward. That's why I texted Alice from your phone that you aren't going to do the song."  
I started shaking with anger and pushed her away from me. I looked her dead in the eye and did not like what I saw. She had this cold callous look on her face that said _I'd spit in your eye_ _in a second_ and I was disgusted.

"How dare you."

"I know what's best for you Edward. If your sister had her way you'd be off chasing dreams of being a damn rock star in L.A. instead of being here with me doing something real with your life."

I brushed past her grabbing my phone off the coffee table but she snatched it from me, threw her arms around my neck and pressed the length of her body against me. I grabbed her wrists, gently pulling them apart and stepped out of her reach but she launched herself at me again, rubbing against me and trying to stick her tongue in my mouth.

"Tanya, stop it!" I said pushing her away from me.  
"Oh so now you don't want me because I made you angry."  
"No, I don't want you because you're selfish and controlling. That decision is not yours to make and you better hope that when I tell her you sent that text she doesn't rip your face off."

Tanya burst into tears and ran into the bedroom. I followed behind her feeling like a jerk for making her cry but at the same time wanting to walk in the other direction out of the house. "Tanya stop crying. Your hysterics aren't going to work on me this time. You had no right to do what you did. It's for Alice's wedding, I'm not going to re-route my whole life _again_ just because I played one song."

Being with someone for 5 years gives them an opportunity to know all your weaknesses and seeing girls cry was my biggest one. As the tears poured from her eyes and her lips trembled all my anger faded and was replaced by the overwhelming need to comfort her. I pulled Tanya into my arms stroking her back and tried kissing her tears away but she just pushed away from me with hurt in her eyes and it just crushed me.

"How can you say that to me Edward? How can you say you don't want me? Everything I do I do for us and I ask one little thing of you…to just stop with all this music crap and focus on a real career and you hate me for it. I wanted a career but I wanted to be a good wife and mother to your children more. You see the sacrifices I make for you Edward? I could be anywhere in the world right now but I'm here with you. Think about that the next time someone asks you to do something that I tell you is bad for US, because I'm always thinking of US. I wish you do would do this same but you tell me you don't want me and that you want your sister to hurt me instead. You're soooo cruel!"

"Tanya I didn't mean it like that. I just…I was upset...you know that I …please stop…stop crying," I pleaded with her from my knees.  
"Then tell her you wont do it…tell her you wont do the song…puhleeze Edward…I don't want to go through that dark time with you again…it was awful and you were miserable and I want you to be happy. Please don't do this to me."

I could feel myself wanting to cave as Tanya reached over me and pulled my shirt over my head. She wrapped her arms around my neck pulling me on the bed with her. Pushing me on my back she started kissing me all over and begging me not to sing at Alice's wedding in between pecks. She moved lower and lower, hovering just above my lap and my body automatically tensed when she reached inside my pants and pulled my cock out. I tried to push her off but then I felt her breath on me and nearly melted when she took one long languid lick around the rosie.

"Tell me you won't do it Edward. Tell me you will give me what I want and you can have what you want." As she spoke she pressed her mouth to my cock allowing her lips to move over it with every word. I had half a mind to grab her by her hair and throw her off but I was already rock-hard and not in the mood to deal with blue balls.

"Tell me Edward," she said as she wrapped her lips around the head of my cock. I instinctively lifted my hips, groaning when I felt myself hit the back of her throat and she began to swallow me. The feeling of her trying to swallow my cock caused my stomach to knot up and I completely forgot about being mad at her. She stared into my eyes, urging me to defy her as she sucked me off, and I for the moment was her putty in her hands. I closed my eyes tightly as my mind went blank and I felt myself running head on to the point of no return but a new sensation made my eyes pop open only to see that Tanya had impaled herself on me. She was riding me hard and fast with this haughty look in her eye that said _I own you._

And at that moment I hated her for it because I knew she was right.

I watched her owning me in the way that only she could and had to swallow the bile that had risen in my throat when she looked down and gazed into my eyes and I realized I didn't recognize her at all. She wasn't the girl I had fallen for years ago anymore…and she hadn't been for a long time. Her breathing started to speed up and she leaned forward pressing her bare breasts against my chest and bucking her hips against me but I was too far gone. I just wanted her to finish and get the hell off me so I could go wash off the feeling of dirty stranger sex.

"Come with me Eddie" she whispered in my ear and normally that coupled with the feel of her tits rubbing against me and her tight hold on my manhood would make me roar like a mountain lion but tonight…it did nothing but send trickles or irritation down my spine. I sucked my lips into my mouth, gripped her by the back of her head mushing her face in the pillow, bucked my hips against her, and faked it.

Yup. I faked it.

I puffed up my chest in a few exaggerated pants and did the old hug and roll and then made my breathing even out like I was falling into an orgasm induced sleep. Tanya kissed my chest a few times leaving wet lip rings that seriously made me itch and rolled over to her side of the bed turning on the tv. I lay there in silence for a few moments, re-hashing the events of the night and all of my feelings.

My fondness for Bella was beyond irrational…love at first sight was a myth of books and movies….these things don't just happen in real in life. My feelings were probably stemming from the fact that I had been feeling off with Tanya for a while and I needed to go clear my head before I said or did something stupid. Flipping on the lights I sat up and Tanya turned and looked at me with an annoyed look on her face.

"I thought you were going to sleep." She looked like I just pissed in her cereal.  
"I am but… I'm going home to my parents this weekend." Tanya exhaled deeply, rolled her eyes at me, and turned back towards the TV.  
"I suppose this mean I have to go with you?"  
"No. I'm going by myself. You stay. I need to clear my head a little."  
"See I knew you were going to do this," she grumbled. I leaned down and kissed her shoulder, pulling the length of my body against her.  
"This isn't about the song. I'm just a little stressed. We both are. I'm just gonna go home for the weekend to spend some time with my parents. You can go out with the girls…do whatever."

I peered over her, she had this little shit eating grin on her face that made me instinctively tighten my grip on her momentarily. "Okay Eddie, whatever you want," she said nonchalantly sliding from the bed. "You get some sleep. I'm going to go call the girls and make some plans for the weekend okay."

Once she was closed the door I smoothed the sheets out on her side of the bed and turned my face into the pillow. I was suddenly overcome with this needy empty feeling…a feeling that says my life is about to change in a big way and I'm not sure I can handle it. And then I remembered that I was a man and rolled to the middle of the bed. Within minutes I was asleep.

The next morning at breakfast everyone knew something was up just from the look on my face and Alice eventually pried out of me what happened. She hadn't gotten that text after all and I was happy about it not causing her any distress but I also knew my sister…she wasn't about to just let this go. The rest of my week was busy and I stayed late on campus getting work done so I could relax over the weekend. When Friday came I was itching to start my weekend of sleeping late, my mother's home cooking, and the comfort of my old bedroom but most of all, my studio.

"So, things are getting worse hunh?" Alice said as she walked me out to my car after breakfast.

"I didn't say that. I just said things are weird. That's why I'm taking a breather…so I can try to straighten myself out." Alice leaned against the car with this absent look on her face and I leaned next to her suddenly feeling worried.

"Is something going on that you need to tell me about? Is Jasper getting cold feet because you know that's common right?" Alice whipped her head around with and incredulous look on her face and then patted my cheek.

"Are you kidding me? I've never seen a man that wanted to get married so badly in my life. He threatened to kidnap me and take me to Vegas which is soooo out of the question. Imagine me getting married by Elvis!" She bent over laughing and I let her have her moment before clearing my throat so she'd know I was ready to leave. When she righted herself I hugged her and climbed into my car. It was cold and I could see the breath curling out of her mouth and the thoughts of my warm bed sang for me to get a move on. Alice bent over hugging me through the window and the mussed my hair.

"Since I know you'll just call and ask me later, the weirdness seems to be spreading around these days." She winked at me and then danced away from my car and into Japers. We raised hands in goodbye to each other and as I drove away I couldn't help wondering which of my family members the weirdness has spread to but once I hit the highway, I'm sorry to say I didn't care anymore. I cranked up the music and pushed the pedal to the metal and did 90 all the way home to Forks.

No one was there when I got home which wasn't uncommon so I let myself in, threw on some lounge pants, and sprawled out in front of my the living room TV eventually dozing off until I heard my parents come in.

"Edward?" I heard my dad saying from the door and waved a lazy hi. I could hear the click of my mother's shoes across the floor but and she leaned over the back of the couch kissing my cheek.  
"To what do we owe the pleasure of you gracing us with your presence a week early?"  
"Early vacation." I muttered and then she mussed my hair which is of course where my sister got the habit from.

"Well I'm glad you're home. Are you alone?" My mother raised an eyebrow and when I nodded the little glint in her eye was unmistakable. My dad came to stand behind the couch as well, wrapping his arms around my mother and I thought of how nice it was that they were still so in love with each other after 27 years.

"We were just coming in to change for dinner. Are you going to join us?"  
I shook my head no. "I've got to raid Alice's cd's and get some ideas for their song. I want to use something that means something to them."

I watched my parent's eyes literally light up and felt sick to my stomach. "So you're going to do the song?" my mother asked me eagerly and I looked at her like she sprang a second head.

"Yea, did you think I wasn't?"

"Alice told us about the whole text fiasco. I just assumed that you wouldn't so that Tanya wouldn't but upset."

"I don't do everything she says mom."

"Of course you don't honey. I'm just poking some fun at you as usual." She leaned over and kissed the top of my head before turning for the stairs. I watched my father watching her as she climbed the stairs and turned over groaning when I recognized that look on his face.

"Edward-  
"I know. Don't bother you for the next hour. 22 years Dad, I get it horny old man."  
"I was just going to suggest that you write something for Alice and Jasper and that you should make it two because I worked late last night." He winked and I shuddered but secretly I wanted to be him. Not that I wanted to bang my mom, but that I wanted to have the relationship he has when I got to that age.

The rest of my night passed quietly. I didn't do any thinking. I just laid in my room reading, watching tv and randomly scratching my balls whenever I damn well pleased and when I finally fell asleep after gorging on the food my parents brought home for me it was a deep sleep. So deep that I didn't hear my phone ringing all morning and only woke up when my mother came in asking if I was dead and tossed the cordless on the bed.

"It's your sister and she's been frantically trying to reach you all morning."

"What's the matter Alice?" I mumbled into the phone.

"Are you dressed?"

"If by dressed you mean arse naked then yes, I'm dressed. What do you need?"

"Um..no thanks for the mental picture but I need you to do some wedding stuff for me while you're home but if you can't I understand."

"Of course I can. What do you need?"

"For you to go put the deposit down on my cake and make sure the names are spelled right and everything. You need to speak to Marisa and only Marisa and do it today. Like within the next hour or two. I don't want you to miss her."

"Got it. Cake…money…names…Marisa. Anything else." She was silent on the other end long enough for me to nod back off to sleep.  
"Edward!"

"What?"

"I said thank you. And enjoy your weekend." There was a weird musical laughter in her tone. The tone she always had when she was up to something though for the life of me I couldn't have imagined what it was. So when I walked into the bakery/café and hour and a half later I was surprised but not that surprised at who was sitting on one of the old couches with her feet tucked underneath her and her nose in a battered copy of Wuthering Heights. The sun was setting behind me casting just enough light for me to see the red highlight twinkling in her hair.

My heart started to pound and my palms started to sweat and it took all of my brain control to walk past her and up to the counter to do what I came here for.  
"Um, is Marisa here?" I asked the short red head that was behind the counter.  
"No, she doesn't work Saturdays ever." They way she said it made me feel like I was supposed to know this and I had the feeling that Alice did know this…and that Marisa wasn't the_ her_ I shouldn't miss.  
" Is there anything I can help you with?" The girl seemed capable enough for what I was here for so I said, "I'm here to place a deposit on the cake for the Cullen/Hale wedding?"  
"The who?"  
"The cake for the Cullen/Hale wedding." I watched her run down a list a names on the computer, nervously drumming my fingers on the counter and trying to ignore the feelings that I had come here to get rid of that were now buzzing around in my stomach like I had just swallowed a handful of bees.

'Oh here we are," she said after what seemed like a lifetime, "And you are?"  
"Does it matter?"  
"Look it for our records. I have to take down the names of the people who physically hand me money for stuff like this. So what it is?"  
"Edward. Edward Cullen."But when I said it my voiced cracked in this pre-pubescent boy going through the change way and I could feel a pair of eye boring a hole into my back. I knew if I turned around those eyes would be deep-chocolate pools oozing with sexy and I would want to jump in and swim around in them.

I knew my sister well enough to know that somehow she had staged this "chance" meeting and I wasn't going to lie and say I wasn't grateful for it. Maybe the opportunity to speak to Bella alone would help me sort out my feelings and if for nothing else than she was damn beautiful and I just liked the idea of being able to look at her.

The girl took my money and because I didn't know what else to do I ordered the most difficult to make sounding coffee and waited until I could properly compose myself to turn around because nothing in this world would make me let myself look foolish in front of her again and nothing on this planet was going to make me walk out of there without talking to her.

I took my cafémochawhatthefuck and turned around to see that her eyes were still glued to me and that the cup in her hand was shaking as she raised it to her mouth and pressed her lips around the edge. I walked over to her slowly, our eyes locked in this intense staring match. My concentration broke when she swallowed and my eyes flicked to her throat watching as the liquid moved slowly down inside of her. The corner my mouth twitched into my signature smile before I opened my mouth and said -

"Hello."

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**A/N What ever is that little pixie up to? And what will Bella and Edward do now that they have "somehow" ended up alone together?**

**Please review, let me know what you think so far, and be sure to check out my other stories!!!**

**BTW...who's going out to support Rob this weekend? I know i am!  
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	4. There is a Light

**A/N Yea so Life sucks. So sorry about taking forever to update but I've had the worst case of writers block ever and i seriously considered quitting and doing a whole career change because I'm in school to be a writer. However after much encouragement for me to work through this I have managed to squeeze something out. It's not everything I wanted it to be but something is better than nothing so I hope you enjoy."**

**

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****There is a Light that Never Goes Out**

_Take me out tonight...Because I want to see people and I _

_Want to see life_

_Driving in your car...Oh, Please don't drop me home_

_Because it's not my home it's their home...And I'm welcome no more._

_**There is a light that Never Goes out- The Smiths**_

**BPoV**

It was only fair that my week following that night in Rose's kitchen would go as horribly as it did. It was, I suspected, the universes way of punishing me for my blatant flirting with Edward and for not being able to keep him off my mind. Jacob and I argued most of the week and my publishing company let go of all their interns so I was regrettably out of a job. I looked forward to going home for the weekend even if that meant I had to be around. That was of course until I got there and she did everything she could possibly do to annoy the hell out of me.

Sue's party was going great. Everyone seemed to be having a good time but of course I wouldn't have really known because I spent the entire time in the kitchen over the hot stove cooking while Jacob helped entertain guests. Then the phone rings and Charlie goes rushing out of the door to a motorcycle accident that happened on the highway. I could literally feel the shift of atmosphere in the house and walked out to the living to find Jacob and that's when I saw them. Jacob and Leah were standing across the room from other staring with these looks on their faces that made the bile rise in my throat.

It was a look that said I can't wait to have you...or I've had you and I can't wait to have you again.

Without thinking I rushed out of the house just as Alice called to check on me and after listening to me vent about how angry I was told me to go someplace and relax before I drove myself crazy. I climbed into my truck and drove to the one place I felt the least likely to run into anyone I know. So of course I was thoroughly surprised when Edward walked in.

I heard the bells of the door jingle when he opened it. He stepped in, bringing with him a breeze of cold January air that stung as it passed through my thin cotton shirt. This is what caught my attention in the first place and when I looked up and saw him I blushed and stupidly covered my face with my book. I was sure he hadn't seen me, he didn't wave or acknowledge me, but when I heard him at the counter saying his name...the way his voice slightly cracked as if he was nervous...I knew he knew I was there. I watched him intently, wondering if he'd come and talk to me, relieved yet nervous at the same time when he sat across from me and spoke.

"Hello."

"Hey there," I answered trying to sound casual although I can see so I know he could, the tea cup shaking in my hand.

"Didn't expect to run into you here," he said smiling before sipping from his cup. His face turned up in disgust and he put the cup on the table between us quite forcefully before laughing. "Well that's just God awful."

His laughter was infectious. I found myself smiling back at him like a drunken fool before I could think of anything to say. "You live around here?" I finally stammered out.

"Yes, well, my parents do. We...they...own a house right outside of town. It's where we grew up. Do you?"

"My dad does. He's the chief of police."

"You're Chief Swan's daughter? Wow, I would have never guessed it. I mean I guess I would have put two and two together if I had of known you were from here."

"I'm not exactly from here, I was born here but when my parents split up my mom and I moved to Phoenix, then in the middle of my junior year I moved back."

"Well," he said running his hand through his glorious head of hair, "That would explain why we never met before. I was homeschooled my last two years of high school. Small world though isn't it."

He's smiled that sexy half smile, flustering me beyond being able to speak, and I could feel my cheeks burning. Nervously I nodded and took a sip of my tea.

"So what brings you home this weekend Bella?" He asked me sitting back against the battered couch and licking his bottom lip. Watching him, all I could think of was what they tasted like.

"Stepmom's birthday party is today," I answered looking embarrassedly down at my lap.

" What, you don't like your step mother or something?"

"No, I like her just fine. She's great for Charlie."

"Not a fan of family gatherings then?"

"No...It's not that." The look on Leah and Jake's faces sprang to my mind and I tried to hide my irritation but I didn't do a very good job.

"I'm sorry if I'm bothering you...am I...bothering you?" He put one hand on the arm of the couch like he was going to get up and I reached out grabbing his hand, stopping him.

"No! No not at all. It's just been a long week."

"I hear you."

Edward flopped back against the couch running his hand through his hair and with his hair pushed he looked worn out. We stared at each other for a moment, neither of us knowing exactly what to say when suddenly he jumped up and grabbed my hand.

"Do you want to take a ride with me? I was going to go up to my studio and look for some sheet music wedding songs. I was thinking maybe you could help me pick something, if you don't mind of course."

Butterflies started a dance party in my stomach as I nodded and he pulled me up from the couch. He smiled down at me as we walked out to the car and it wasn't until he was opening the door that I noticed we were still holding hands. On the drive up our conversation was effortless, it felt like we were old friends just catching up but that could have been because we weren't looking at each other. He was funny, making jokes about people that we ended up knowing from high school. We talked about his family, about how close he and his siblings were, and I could see his eyes lighting up when he talked about his parents. He turned off the main road, up a dirt path that winded through the trees, up to his enormous house and parked.

"I'm sorry but we'll have to walk the rest of the way. The ground isn't clear enough for my car and Emmett has his truck."

"That's okay," I said unknowingly slipping my hand back into his, "I don't mind a little cold." We huddled together, our bodies pressed against each other for warmth and ten minutes later, with chattering teeth, we arrived at what had to be hands down the most romantic little cottage I'd ever seen in my life. It was like something out of a fairytale, all wood with a whitewashed log gate surrounding it and a cobble stone path way leading up to the door, which he opened with a skeleton key, and to my surprise it was warm inside. A fire was dying underneath the flat screen tv. that was mounted on the wall and the room was filled with mismatched furniture and a pool table in front of a kitchenette.

"This is your studio?"I asked incredulously.

"Yea,kind of. My studio is actually in the back. This is our "playhouse" for lack of a better word. Mom set it up so we could hang out and not have to worry about anything getting broken. " Edward walked off toward the tiny kitchen area and pulled two mugs out of the cabinet. He put a tea kettle on the stove and then turned, leaning against it and facing me smiling. "Feel free to look around."

Instead of just looking around I went searching for the bathroom. When I came out I could hear the tinkling of piano keys and followed the sound to the back of the house where Edwards fully loaded studio was. I watched him from the other side of the plexi glass for a moment, he was sipping from the mug doing scales on the piano and the look of contentment on his face set my heart of flutter. He was practically glowing, and I couldn't imagine what on earth could make him want to be a doctor instead of doing something he seemed so passionate about.

"This is amazing...really I've never seen anything like it."

"Thank you," he murmured not bothering to turn around. "I haven't been in here in almost a year now."

"What made you stop playing if you don't mind me asking?" Edward's body tensed up as I moved behind to sit behind him. He moved slowly, turning around to face me with a wry smile on his face.

"Wont you do for love right? Tanya...she wants to be a doctor's wife, and when you love someone as much as I loved her...you find that you'd do anything to make them happy."

I glanced around the room quickly, a ball of irritation building deep in the pit of my stomach as my eyes passed over all of his carefully placed instruments. How could anyone be as selfish as in to take away from him something he so clearly loves?

"What about your happiness...isn't that of any importance to her at all?"I spat out quickly without thinking.

"I...I would certainly hope so but to be honest I'm not so sure anymore." Edward ran his fingers through his hair and sat back against the piano with a look of defeat on his face. I felt a sudden urge to take him in my arms, instead I reached for the mug he placed next to me and leaned back as far as I could against the wall.

"So I take it you've hit a bit of a snag then?"

"A snag...I'd say it's like more of pot hole...a ditch....a fucking hole in the earth."

"I'm sorry."

"Heh, don't be. I'm not...I mean I am...It's a horrible feeling to sit around and wait for the inevitable to happen. Part of me feels like I should try and fix it and the other part is just too damn tired to try."

And uncomfortable silence filled the room. It seemed like Edwards words were sinking in as if they were a sudden epiphany. It occurred to me that my phone hadn't rang once since I left the house and I wondered if me and Jake hadn't fallen into the same pit.

"I'm sorry," he said abruptly breaking the silence. "I didn't mean to dump all that on you. I can't seem to hold my tongue around you. It's completely ridiculous, I know, but I feel like I can talk to you.

"It's not ridiculous. I feel the same way. If you want to know the truth I...left the party because of my boyfriend...and his...his friend...It was weird...the way they were looking at each other. I know I probably should have stayed but it's just this girl...I feel like she's sort of invading my life. Her mom married my dad which was fine but then I find out that she's practically living in my old room and she and her mom redecorated the entire house...it doesn't even feel like my home anymore."

"Hmm...temper temper I see," he said with a slight smirk on his face.

"Say what now?"

"You've got a bit of a temper. You turn all red when you get worked up...in fact...you turn red a lot."

"Thanks Captain Obvious."

"You're welcome first mate Well Aware." He cracked a smile and the busted out laughing clearly finding his joke funnier than it actually was but I laughed with him because with the smile on his face how could you not.

"That really sucks though," he said getting up and crossing the room. "You know the thing with your boyfriend and his friend, but I wouldn't worry too much about it. I mean look at you...you're not the type of girl someone would be dumb enough to cheat on. You're smart, funny, beautiful. Who could ask for anything more?"

My face was turned beet red and when I looked up at him he had this "oh shit" look on his face. He caught my eye for a moment and then turned away quickly and began rummaging through a box. He pulled out a thick blue folder and walked back over to the piano, a small smile creeping onto his face as he looked at me from the corner of his eyes and sat down.

"That book you were reading earlier looks really old, how many times have you read it?"

"So many that I probably don't even need to read it anymore. I could probably recite every line word for word."

"I have a song like that...it was one of the first songs I learned to play. I was thinking Alice would like this one...tell me what you think."

Edward glanced at me over his shoulder before running his fingers over the keys and begins to play a song. It sounded all fancy at first, but then the tune started to become familiar. When my ears finally picked up on what I couldn't hold back my laughter as he began belting out the words.

"_It's time to play the music...It's time to light the lights...It's time to meet the Muppets on the Muppet show tonight"_

"The Muppet Show? Are you serious?"I didn't realize until he looked up at me that I had moved to stand next to him.

"What...that's a great song?

"Nothing I was just expecting something classical, you know something an instructor would teach you."

"But he did. Actually I begged him to teach it to my for Mom's birthday one year."

"You really love your parents hunh?"

"With all my heart...they're great people. I can't wait for you to...I mean um...you'll meet them soon I guess."

Edward's cheeks tinged red and I took a step back from him. I felt drawn to him like moths to a light bulb, knowing I should stay away but not being able to. Something inside me was screaming to be closer to him but at the same time I was aware that I was teetering on the edge of something dangerous. There was something about the way that he looked at me, something in his eyes that made me forget everything I was supposed to remember.

"So do you know what you're going to recite at the reception?"Edward's words broke me out of my thoughts and I shook my head replying quickly, "Not a clue."

"Me either. I mean my parents want me to write something...but I've never been any good with lyrics...I'm more of composer kind of guy. I wanted to be the next Danny Elfman or Carter Burwell. That's why they did all this for me. Besides I'm better at singing to guitar than to piano."

"You sing too?" He seemed to get more amazing by the second. As sexy as I found his speaking voice I could only imagine what his singing voice would do to me. "Would you sing for me?" I asked him against my better judgment.

"I just did," he said laughing.

"No...I mean a real song."

"That is a real song."

"You know what I mean Edward!"

"Okay, okay...I'll sing for you already. Sit down." He grabbed my wrist, his eyes flashing up towards mine before he jerked me back towards the bench and reached for his guitar at the same time.

"What would you like to hear little miss pushy?"

"Anything," I whispered. My wrist tingled where he touched me sending tremors of excitement thoughout my body. Edward propped his foot against the bench on the side of me and rested a sleek black acoustic guitar against his knee. He ran his hand along the neck of the guitar and suggestively along its curves, all the while his eyes were locked on mine. The look on his face was completely lust and I imagined briefly what it would feel like to feel his hands run along the curves of my body the way he was doing the guitar.

"This is Dahlia, she was my first." He turned it towards me showing the red roses that were engraved onto the body.

"She's beautiful."

He began strumming the guitar; his body completely relaxed and closed his eyes. He began humming, gently yet from deep in his throat. When he began singing his lips barely moved but the voice that came out captured me in a trance. His voice was hauntingly beautiful, and as he continued through the song the throbbing between my legs became more apparent. It was as if he were singing directly to my clitoris and watching the way his fingers ran up and down the neck of the guitar didn't help. I couldn't remember the last time I was this turned on andby the time he finished I was on the edge of my seat, practically in his face. When he opened his eyes and met mine, he pulled his bottom lip into his mouth, breathing out through his nose before reaching up to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear.

"That was beautiful."I breathed out leaning into his hand. Our close proximity allowed his sweet breath to wash over me and I could smell his cologne surrounding me. My hands itched to touch him, run up his thighs and around his back to pull my body closer to his but he held my at his arms length looking over my face. I cast my eyes down, suddenly self-conscious of our closeness and Edward tilted my head up, making me to look at him again.

"Don't...please don't turn your eyes away from me Bella...You have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen."

I blushed full on, yet my body was leaning more towards him, our lips coming closer and closer together, so close that I could feel the warmth from his lips radiating onto mine, when suddenly my phone rang, the shrill bells shrieking in the air jerking us apart. I fumbled for my bag, dropping the phone on the floor before opening it and gasping my guilt ridden hello into the phone.

"Bella, where are you?"

"I...uh...I had to um...I stepped out for a minute Dad, why...is everything okay?

"Everything's fine, I was just worried. Sue said you left right after me, I wanted to make sure you're okay. Where are you?"

I exhaled slowly, meeting Edwards eyes for a moment before getting up and walking to the other side of the room. "I ran into Alice's brother, I was helping him with something. I'll be home soon." I turned back to face Edward but he was already walking past me, my bag and the two cups in this hands. He motioned with his head for me to follow him, and I slipped my phone into my back pocket, worry and rejection washed through me. I felt like I had crossed some terrible line and made him feel uncomfortable

He didn't speak as I followed him out to the kitchen or when he plopped my bag on the counter and sat the cups in the sink, but then he turned around and grabbed me in his arms. I wrapped my arms around him, pressing against him so hard I thought I would actually go through him. He leaned down rubbing his face against mine and brushed his lips against the corner of my mouth up to my ear.

"You feel it too don't you?" He whispered into my ear sending tingles down my spine.

"Yes," I breathed out completely intoxicated by his scent and the feeling of his body pressed against mine.

"So, what do we do?"

"I...I don't know."

He took a step back from me, my body him missing instantly, and ran his fingers through my hair. "I guess we could be friends. There's no harm in that right?"

"Right."

"And since we're going to be seeing a lot of each other over the next month we should get along right?"

"Right.

I knew in my heart that I could never look at him as just a friend. Evena fter all the time I was with Jake he never had this effect on me, was never able to take my breath away or make my skin feel electric. I knew that what I should have been saying was no. What I should have said was that it's obvious we're both way to attracted to each other for this to not turn out bad. What I should have said was that I loved Jacob and that my letting him touch me that way, look at me that way, that my coming up to his studio and being alone with him was dead wrong but I didn't. In that moment something in my brain told me that I couldn't bear to not have him in my life, that the thought of walking out of this door and never feeling this comfortable, this happy, this rush of excitement and ardor again would surely kill me.

"There's no harm in us being friends as long as we you know...don't cross any boundaries or whatever." I shrugged nonchalantly and turned towards the door hoping he didn't catch the "bullshit" look on my face.

"Right boundaries."

On the ride back to my car Edward played music and cracked little jokes to ease the tension we now felt. Now that our feelings were apparent to both of us they became the elephant in the back seat spraying water all over us with its massive walked me to my car, holding the door open for me as I climbed in. I quickly rolled the window, eager to share a few more moments from him when he leans into my car and reaches for my phone. He punched something into it and then his phone started to ring.

"Can you let me know that you go home okay?" I nodded but on the inside I was doing the snoopy dance.

"When I got in Charlie was asleep on the couch and I could hear Sue in the shower upstairs. No sign of Jacob...or Leah...anywhere. I would have been angry had I not been with Edward but the fact of the matter was I didn't want to be a hypocrite, so I climbed the stairs to my old room and pushed all of Leah's crap off my bed. Looking around I suddenly felt alone. My body still tingled from Edward's embrace but when I laid down in my empty bed all I felt was an empty guilty feeling I curled into a ball thinking over the whole day, my thoughts repeatedly running over how it felt to be in Edwards arms and how strangely comforting it was. A little after one in the morning Jacob slipped into my bed wrapping his arms around me and running his hand along my stomach beneath my shirt.

"Where'd you disappear to, I turned my back for one second and you were gone." Hot irritation flushed through me. The nerve of him to question me when he was gone for hours and never even bother to call me.

"Well my phone didn't ring once so you couldn't have been too concern," I spat at him rolling out of his arms.

"If you remember correctly I was at a party...you know the one for your stepmom that you walked out of?"

"Partys been over for hours Jake. You questioned me about where I was but where have you been all night."

"Leah got a little drunk so I had to drive her and my dad home since he came with her. I hung out at his place for a little. Is that okay with you?"

"Yea okay," I mumbled and turned away from him. I couldn't tell if I was really upset with him or if I was just letting my guilt get the best of me and thought it better not to argue anymore.

"Aww come on Bells. Please don't be mad at me. I know what this is about and I'm sorry for last week okay. I'm sorry if you fee like I'm abandoning you but with Seth away at college Leah didn't have any help with this. I was just helping out okay. When you left I figured you would come right back but when you didn't I got kind of pissed. Where'd you go anyway?"

"Wedding stuff for Alice," I lied quickly turning my face into the pillow so Jake wouldn't be able to tell.

Jacob stretched and nodded turning over onto his back and pulled me onto his chest. "I hope I get to meet her before the wedding. I'm glad you found such a good friend out there. I know you get lonely with me always coming home to La Push. I promise I'll try and spend more time with you." Jacob kissed the top of my head and squeezed me tighter. I listened to his breathing even out as he fell asleep while his words ate away at my heart.

My guilt kept me from sleeping that night. I felt like I was suddenly being torn in two, one part of me feeling devoted to the one I loved since I was kid, the other part...the part felt that if I turned away now it would hurt and I couldn't explain why. I replayed the time I spent with Edward in my head and as the morning light crept through my window I decided that we could maintain a friendship if that's what he wanted...and if it seemed that he wanted something more I would turn away.

I loved Jacob and I knew deep down that he loved me to. I could never do anything to hurt him.

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**A/N And Bob's you're uncle.**

**I hope you guys liked it...what would really help my depressing case of writers block is if my lovable readers would drop me a line...even if you didn't like it...tell me where i went wrong.**

**In any case, thanks to anyone who took the time out to read and thanks so much in advance to anyone who is nice enough to reviews....Its not only for myself but for my readers that I am trying my hardest to climb out of this rut that I'm in.  
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	5. Skinny Love

**A/N I don't really have much to say this time other than thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy. This is an awesome song by the way and everyone should listen to it because it's awesome. **

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****Skinny Love**

_And I told you to be patient…And I told you to be fine_  
_And I told you to be balanced…. And I told you to be kind_  
_And In the morning I'll be with you….But it will be a different "kind"_  
_And I'll be holding all the tickets ….And you'll be owning all the fines_  
_**Skinny Love- By Bon Iver**_

**EPOV**

It felt weird to be home even after such a short weekend away and it wasn't because my place was actually clean or that it was sans girlfriend, not that I was exactly expecting a warm welcome back. Something just seemed off. It was that strange feeling a person has when they realize someone's broken into their house. After assuring myself that hadn't happened, everything seemed in its place, I sank on the couch in front of the TV and proceed to let the monotony of day-time television drown out any intelligent thought.

Of course that didn't happen. Instead I found myself staring at the ceiling letting the events of my weekend run rampant in my mind. Convinced as I was that my meddling sister had something to do with my "chance" meeting, I chose not to complain. Sometimes we just have be thankful for life's little gifts and not question them.

It seemed that whatever "it" was that I felt for Bella was a mutual feeling. "It" had no name or reasoning but "it" was real. "It" seemed tangible. "It" was what made me act on impulse and ask her up to the studio. "It" was the reason I carried the scent of her perfume to bed with me had the best night of sleep I had had that wasn't alcohol or orgasm induced in as long as I could remember. But all "it" would be is a friendship.

Just as I began drifting off to sleep my phone began buzzing on the coffee table startling me. I was expecting it to be Tanya but was pleasantly surprised to find -Bella- on the screen.

_You know what I hate…Mondays…at least if I had a job to go to I wouldn't be sitting in my apartment doing nothing- _She text and this seemed like an open invitation for an invitation. Though my mind was screaming **STOP…DESIST….DO NOT PROCEED** my fingers acted on their own accord working in cohorts with the little devil me on my left shoulder.

_Meet for lunch? I'm not doing anything either-_ I text her back. I waited patiently for her answer texting- _you_ _pick I pay- _in between. She text me back a smiley face, the name of a restaurant on the other side of town, and one hour. I hopped in the shower and practically sprinted back to my bedroom to get dressed. It wasn't until I was staring at my bed trying to choose between the black v-neck sweater and the cream knitted one that I realized I was being completely ridiculous and acting like a girl who was getting ready for her first date. I finally settled on the cream sweater and black jeans, threw on my boots and my cuff and headed out the door.

Bella wasn't there when I got to the restaurant so I got us a table and read through the menu patiently. Someone pacing in the window caught my attention and when I looked up it was her. She was wearing a black pea coat with a red scarf tied around her neck. Her hair flayed out behind her, the sunlight bouncing off it as she paced back and forth talking on her mobile. She stopped and pulled her bottom lip into her mouth biting it. She pulled the phone away from her ear, looked at it then shoved it in her pocket before running her fingers through her hair and reaching for the handle on the door.

I stared down at the menu so she wouldn't know I had been watching her. The table shook, hitting me in the stomach and when I looked up Bella was bright faced gripping the edge of it.

"Oh Damnitt! I'm sorry Edward…I tripped…did that hit you?"

"Yeah but no major damage caused," I said standing up to pull out her chair. As I was helping her out of her coat I noticed she was shivering and wrapped her scarf around her shoulders. "Bella did you walk here? You're freezing."

"Uh yeah, my truck wouldn't start and Jake wasn't around to look at it."

"I would have picked you up Bella, you should have called me." My voice sounded a little sterner than I had meant it to but she smiled at me anyway covering my hand with hers.

"I only live a few blocks away Edward. It's okay."

"Yeah but it's like two degrees outside. You could catch pneumonia. Next time just call and I'll pick you up."

"Next time…who said there was gonna be a next time?" She said raising her eyebrow at me while taking a slow sip of her water. Our eyes locked for a moment and I was stifled. How could she not want to see me again? Had I misread all of the signals?

There was a sudden burst of sound shocking me out of my manic thoughts. This sound was a sound that my brain instantly knew it wanted to hear for the rest of my life; Bella was laughing.

"You should see your face right now," she said giggling behind her hand.

I smiled back at her nervously running my fingers through my hair trying to use the moment to think of a witty comeback but came up with nothing. With Bella I had found that I either talked too much or was too stunned by her beauty to speak at all.

"Do you know what you're gonna order?" She asked glancing back at her menu breaking the awkward silence.

"Mushroom ravioli…You?"

"Funny…I was going to order the same thing."

We smiled at each other then looked away abashedly just as the waitress was coming towards us. I could feel the heat from her staring; this wasn't something I wasn't accustomed to, however it was the first time that I was bothered. The waitress stepped up to my side gently brushing her hip against my arm. I looked at Bella to see if she noticed…she had. She sort of sank into her chair while her cheeks tinged pink. I slowly stretched my arm across the table taking Bella's hand in mine giving the waitress a not so subtle hint that her blatant flirting was all for naught. She was obviously only speaking to me and though I answered her as politely as possible; my eyes never left Bella's face.

"Some people can be so rude," I said quietly as the waitress walked away. I may have been annoyed, but I didn't want spit in my food. Bella laughed and all was well in my world.

"She looked like she was going to bite you or something."

"Wouldn't be the first time a strangers bit me," I blurted out. Bella's eyes opened wide with shock. "My girlfriend has really strange friends with really strange ways of saying _nice to meet you."_

"Hmm, sounds…strange." She laughed again slipping her hand from mine and putting it somewhere underneath the table.

"So how was the rest of your weekend?" I asked quickly changing the subject. She just shrugged and placed her straw between her beautiful lips. Then, of course, I couldn't stop staring at them.

"Yours?" she asked speaking over the straw that I was imagining was my finger in her mouth again. I shrugged, shifting in my seat uncomfortably. "Lazy Sunday. I hung out with my parents for most of the day and worked in the studio until I fell asleep. I just got home this morning."

"I came home last night. I couldn't stand it there anymore. When my dads not around Leah acts like such a bitch and everyone just let's her do it. Her mom feels bad for moving off the rez and Jake…well he just keeps telling me to ignore her…but its hard you know."

"Yes, I find it quite difficult to ignore bad female behavior." Bella looked at me like I had just grown a second head and then I realized what I said and how chauvinistic it must have sounded. "My girlfriend has been acting out lately," I reasoned but realized that again I sounded like and intolerant father. The waitress came at the perfect moment sliding to steaming hot plates in front of us.

"Smells good," Bella said inhaling the fumes.

"Looks good," I countered and picked up my fork prepared to eat. Our conversation however took a turn for the better. Bella started questioning me about my plans for the wedding song which turned into a conversation on music in general. I wasn't surprised that we had similar tastes, something Tanya and I had never had. Bella confessed that she couldn't get the song I had sung or my voice out her head. I confessed that I hadn't written it. She seemed disappointed.

We talked and talked about any and everything barely touching the food on our plates. She was easy to talk to once I got control of my nerves. She wasn't one of those people that waited to talk; she actually listened and seemed genuinely interested in everything that I had to say. It wasn't until my mobile started buzzing in my pocket that I realized how much time had passed. I looked at the caller ID and almost didn't want to answer it. It was Tanya and the realization that when I walked out of the door it was to her that I was going home to and not Bella…and that was disappointing.

"Eddie baby where are you?" she whined when I answered.

"Out," I answered back already annoyed.

"Out where? I haven't seen you since Friday. I miss you. Come home."

"You miss me?" I replied back skeptically.

"Yeah I missed you silly head. I even bought you something today."

I couldn't recall the last time Tanya had actually bought me something that wasn't a birthday or Christmas present. Anniversaries were all about her as was Valentines Day. _She must want something, _I reasoned. She was being way to nice. I paid the bill while Bella was in the ladies room and when she came out she looked upset. Again she had her mobile in her hand looking at it like it would grow legs and crawl up her arm.

"Everything okay?" I asked as I helped her into her coat. She responded with a nod, her eyes glued to the floor. I gently lifted her chin and she raised her eyes up to me slowly. They were brimming over with tears.

"Jake is staying at La Push again tonight. He didn't come home with me yesterday even though he promised we would spend more time together. I don't know what I'm doing wrong."

Her bottom lip starting to tremble and having seen enough girls cry, I knew that meant she was about to burst into tears. Quickly I grabbed her hand and pulled her outside. It was cold and had started to snow again but I didn't care because I had pulled Bella into my arms and was hugging her tightly. She wound her arms around my neck pressing against me, holding me just as tight, and began to cry. Her body shook in my arms and I held her, my one hand cradling the back of her head holding it against my shoulder, the other held tightly around her back.

What happened next seemed to happen in slow motion. There we were standing in the middle of the sidewalk with the snow falling hard around us blanketing everything in white. Bella pulled back slowly so that we were looking at each other…into each other. Her lips parted slightly as if she were about to speak but no words came out, just as a cloud of her breath floating up between us as we moved closer together.

My lips slid perfectly between hers and it was as if electric currents were shooting up through my feet from the ground. I felt like my skeleton was about to jump out of my body and do the thriller dance in the middle of the street because Bella's kiss…the tiny moan she made when I sucked her bottom lip between mine…it went straight to my bones. Bella had pulled me closer jutting her knee between mine so that we stood locked together in the middle of the sidewalk like the lava from Mount Vesuvius had encased us in stone right where we stood. She tangled her fingers into my hair pulling me more into her kiss. I wrapped my arms around her waist, lifting her feet off the ground, and almost died when I felt her warm tongue circle around mine in my mouth.

Her lips were the softest I had ever had the pleasure of kissing, her taste was sweet...so unlike Tanya who usually tasted like alcohol and vomit. I could have stood there kissing her, feeling her hands tugging gently at my hair for the rest of my life.

But it ended abruptly. Very abruptly. Some idiot not paying attention walked past bumping into me. I dropped Bella to her feet both of us gasping for air. Bella looked up at me; her fingers pressed to her lips, and stared into my face completely horrified. I on the other hand had never been so confused in my life.

Hadn't she felt what I just felt….the earth move?

"Bella….I'm….I'm sorry….I didn't mean to…" I stammered out as she was clearly hyperventilating. She spun quickly on her heels and almost slipped on the freshly fallen snow. I reached out to grab her but she jerked away from me.

"Don't! Just….don't!" she yelled. With one last look at me over her shoulder she took off running down the street like a bat out of hell. I didn't know what to say. I was frozen…my own pathetic Vesuvius statue holding my hand out like an idiot.

I cursed myself on the way home. How could have been so stupid and insensitive? Here she had been crying over her boyfriend and instead of consoling her the way a friend would I tried to shove my tongue down her throat. Technically I had cheated on Tanya, and for all the wrong she'd done I never once suspected her of cheating. My mind took on a whole new wave of guilt as I walked in the door and saw her sitting on the couch waiting for me.

"Baby!" she screamed running over and jumping on me. Her legs wrapped around my waist and she planted sloppy wet kisses all over my face. Each one felt like a slap for my infidelity. When she tried to kiss my lips I had to stop her. I just couldn't be _that _guy.

"I ate mushrooms babe….and I can still taste them…I don't think you want to kiss me just yet."

"Oh don't be silly. Give me a kiss! I missed you…don't ever leave me like that ever ever again. The next time you go home I want to go with you…because that's where I belong…with you."

I set her on her feet looking her over. She looked different. She had this glint in her eye, one that reminded me of when we first got together, and her bright red lips were fixed into the biggest smile I had seen on her in months. She lowered her head looking up at me from under her lashes and hooked her fingers into the belt loops of my pants.

"Didn't you miss me too?"

"Yes," I lied. I hadn't missed her at all. I barely thought about her.

"I cleaned. Did you see? And I finished the laundry. I'm so glad you're home. I was lonely without you. Come…come see what I bought for you," she said in rapid succession. Too rapid.

I nodded, letting her grab my hand and pull it into the living room. In the corner on my desk there was a box from "Things Remembered" tied with an orange ribbon. I ignored the fact that I abhorred the color orange and opened the box. It was a desk plaque that read Edward A. Cullen M.D. in fancy script.

"It's for your desk…you know when you open your own practice."

"It's uh…great. Thank you."

"I figured if you take summer courses too then you would be able to graduate faster, you know so I…I uh mean we can start planning our lives."

Tanya leaned up on her toes pressing her lips to my neck. Her body pressed against mine, her hands sliding up my chest then back down slowly undoing the buttons on my coat. I wrapped my arms around her, pushing to the back of my mind how awkward it felt…how forced.

"Let's make it an early night Eddie. Let me put you to bed." She nipped at my chest with her teeth, pushing her weight against me so I would walk backwards to the bedroom. I turned her towards the bathroom, shedding her clothes and mine on the way. Bella obviously didn't want me but Tanya…she seemed to be trying. Maybe my leaving that way made her worry that I would leave her and she was going to change…and if she was going to change then things could get better and I wouldn't think about how it felt to have Bella's warm lips moving over mine….her fingers running through my hair…the heat from her body that I could feel through…

My mind ran away from me for a second…the blast of hot water scorching my skin brought me back. Tanya pressed me up against the tiles letting the hot water run over her body. Her hair hung in wet rings around her and she pursed her lips trying to kiss me. I stepped beneath the spray of water, letting it run over my face and into my mouth, letting it wash away the taste of Bella's kiss on my tongue. My cock sprang to life.

"You must have really missed me Eddie," Tanya laughed out reaching for it.

"Um…of course I missed you," I lied as thoughts of Bella's small frame in my arms made me harder. I groaned as Tanya slid her soapy hand over me, squeezing hard.

"Do you want it baby? Do you want me?"

I forced myself to nod and she slid down my body onto her knees. She held her hand on my stomach, holding me against the wall. Her lips slid over me, holding me in her mouth tightly. I moaned and she giggled running her hand up my thigh around to the back. She cupped my ass cheek, her fingers edging towards my crack. I froze in sheer fright before grabbing a fist full of her hair and jerking her head away.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" I barked at her, smacking her hand away from my ass.

"I just wanted to try something fun Edward. Don't be so uptight."

"Something fun? You think sticking your finger up my ass is something fun? No Tanya, that's gross…How could you…why would you…where the hell did you get that idea from?" Tanya bit her bottom lip, sitting on the side of the tub and reached past me to shut the water. I jumped, still weary of that hand and what she planned on doing with it.

"I uh…Kate suggested it to me. I told her that I felt like we were hitting a sort of snag…you know drifting apart and she said that if I tried new things in bed with you that it might spice things up and bring us closer together."

I slumped down in front her and wrapped my arms around her waist feeling even guiltier and still slightly paranoid. I pressed my lips right above her cleavage pulling her arms over my shoulders…as far away from my ass as I could get them without letting her know that's what I was doing. She shuddered under my lips and pulled me between her legs.

"All couples go through this sort of thing Tanya. I've been feeling that way too and that's why I went to clear my head. But I'm back now and I want to fix things okay," I kissed her feeling a spark of what I had felt for her before but images of Bella and the sound of her laughter kept putting it out.

I was suddenly furious with Bella. Here I was riddled with guilt over not only cheating but feeling like I had taken advantage of her, and she had kissed me back. She had flirted with me just as I her and I was beating myself up for it. I wasn't going to let one kiss as mind-blowing as it was tear me apart. I lifted Tanya up, carrying her dripping wet body across the house and dropped her on the bed. If she was worried enough to violate me…then she must have still cared.

"Let's work on us without the fingering okay" I said sliding up between her legs.

"Well, we could do some fingering," she said seductively forcing my hand between us. I laughed, pulling my hand back up grabbing a fist full of her hair. She tilted her head back giving my lips access to her neck and pushed her hips down so that I slid into her, gripping the sheets and sighing out my name.

Her fingers dug into my back as I slowly thrust into her. Her breast bounced beneath me, rubbing against my chest as her hips moved alternately with mine.

"Tell me…Tell me what you want Tanya…what can I do to get you back?" I breathed into her ear and I meant it. I was at the point as I had been before where I would do almost anything to make things how they were.

"You already know how to make me yours forever Edward," she panted out. "Do it…make me yours."

I knew what she was asking…it was on the tip of my tongue to just say it….to just ask her to marry me but I couldn't. Instead I smothered her mouth with mine and pounded away until her nails dug so hard into my back they drew blood and she was screaming my name into my mouth. I was spent minutes after and collapsed on top of her. I didn't wake up until morning.

The rest of the week went by in a blur of tux fittings, stamp licking, medical book reading and coming home to Tanya and making love every night. Thoughts of Bella danced on the outskirts of my mind. She hadn't text me nor answered any of the messages that I sent her though I had the feeling that she may have mentioned something to Alice. At breakfast she kicked me for no reason and then pretended she didn't do it.

The weekend came and as I loaded the car with Tanya's bags, she paced out of earshot on her mobile. While it had been one of the best weeks we'd had in a while, I noticed that at times she acted a little strange. This was one of those times.

"What's with girls and pacing while they're on the phone?" I said as she slid in the car.

"What?"

"You were pacing while you were on the phone. Who were you talking to?"

"No one important." She turned her face out the window and rested her forehead against the glass.

"Everything alright sweetheart?" She flinched when I reached out to stroke her hair.

"Yes Edward. Everything's fine." She slumped down in the seat poking out her lip clearly not alright.

"Alright, what's your problem? Why are you pouting?"

"I'm not pouting," She whined, "I just don't feel like spending my weekend with your family that's all."

"For someone that claims they want to be my wife, you sure do complain a lot about being a part of my family."

Tanya shrugged, turning her attention back out the window. I reached over to grab her hand. She pulled back slightly before letting me take it but held it awkwardly. She was silent, save for her frustrated sighs and then out of no where turned to face me.

"I hope you know that once we're married we won't be doing this."

"Doing what?"

"Spending all this time with your family. I don't like Forks and I don't want to spend any and I mean any of my weekends here. And since we'll be married you can't just leave me for the weekend. It doesn't look right so you won't be going either."

I laughed thinking she was kidding. She had to be kidding. But then I saw the look on her face…the conviction in her voice…she wasn't kidding. I slammed hard on the breaks almost rear-ending Emmett's car in front of us. Tanya's head bounced off the dashboard when she jerked forward. She flew backwards holding her forehead shooting me a death glare.

"Edward what the hell? Keep your eyes on the damn road for Christ sake. What are you trying to do? Kill us?" She slapped my arm screaming. My phone immediately started ringing, Emmett's voice booming over my car speakers.

"Tell Tanya to take your cock out of her mouth so you can drive and not fuck up the back of my car please." Rose laughed in the background.

"Emmett that's so not funny. Quit being such a perv!" Tanya screamed at him. They continued their arguing but I drowned it all out. My mind was still trying to wrap itself around the stupidity that had just come out of her mouth.

"Are you out of your mind?" I snapped.

"What, Geez Edward I was just kidding. Tanya maybe you oughta give him that b.j. cause if I have to spend my whole weekend with him he's gonna need to chill out."

"Not you Emmett. Shut up!" I slammed my hand on the speaker button shutting off the phone and turned to her with fire burning in my eyes. "You…what are you thinking…not be around my family…are you out of your mind?"

"What? We'll be too busy doing married people things to spend all our free time up your parents' butt. You have to know that this isn't normal. I mean come on…you guys are adults and still run home to mommy and daddy every other weekend. Cut the umbilical cord alrea-"

"Shut up in your face!" I sneered at her. "I like being with my family, especially after what happened. If you can't understand that, then too bad. If you don't want to be here…take the fucking car and go get sloshed with your friends. I'll ride up with Emmett and Rose." I swerved the car onto the side of the road and jumped out, bounding around to the back. Emmett and Rose pulled over a few feet in front of me and Emmett got out, trudging through the snow and up to Tanya's window.

"Did you guys get a flat or something?"

"No!" I barked throwing the trunk open. Tanya shuffled out of the car pushing past Emmett and grabbed my shoulder jerking me away from the trunk.

"Move out of the way so I can get my shit and go home. If you don't want to come then don't. I wouldn't want to stand in the way of your coke sniffing." I could feel myself shaking, my blood boiling in my veins. The wind whipped around us choking the air in my throat. Tears started to well in Tanya's eyes and she threw herself on me, almost making us stumble into traffic.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I said that. It was mean. Please don't be mad at me. Please don't say things like that in front of your brother…I'm sorry. I take it back…I'm sorry," she sobbed. I was still shaking with anger but she seemed truly sorry for what she said.

"I love you Edward. And I love your family. I want to be a part of it…I'm sorry okay. I'm sorry."

I went numb. Emmett looked at me shaking his head. The look on his face said he had an idea of what she could have said to piss me off so bad and the fact that he mouth "pussy-whipped" to me before turning back to his car let me know he was disgusted. As was I.

"Do you forgive me?" she asked when we were back in the car. I nodded. I didn't but in effort to prolong our streak of getting along, I lied. She turned to speak again but by this time I had turned up the radio, drowning her out and only heard pieces of what she was babbling during the silence of a song change.

I should have known when passing the rusty red truck in the driveway that there was going to be an unexpected guest in the house. I walked in, leaving Tanya to carry her own bags up and almost fell backwards on the stairs from the garage.

There she was. Bella. Sitting on a bar stool next to my mother laughing and smiling while Alice stood beside her pointing at pictures in a photo album. All three sets of eyes focused on me but mine were staring into Bella's. A deep red blush quickly spread across her face and chest making my mouth water.

All the anger that I had built up for her running away and ignoring me all week flew right out of my mind.

"What are you doing here?" I stammered out.

"Um…bridesmaid, remember doofus? What's got you so bent out of shape? You're as red as a tomato." Alice answered for her.

"Edward! Didn't I teach you better manners than that? Jesus!" My mom said coming over and smacking me in the back of the head. "You remember the word hello right. There's also a shortened version you can use…its hi." She pinched my side making me squeak my hello. Tanya bustled into the room with her bags, dropping them right on my foot after following my line of vision. I hadn't stopped staring since I walked into the room…well until I was dancing from Tanya dropping her bags on my foot.

"Mom!" she screamed throwing her arms around my very frightened mother. In all the years we'd been together, Tanya had never shown any affection towards my mother. She eyed me suspiciously, patting Tanya awkwardly on the back.

"Well hello Tanya, it's nice to see you again."

"You too! It's been so long. You look great, really. Have you lost weight or something? I love what you done with your hair. Those highlights look great on you! So where's dad? Is he home?" Tanya made a show of craning her neck searching for my father while my mother mouthed _when did she start calling us Mom and Dad _at me. I shrugged, motioning with my finger that she was losing her mind. Tanya then proceeded to make her way to my sister with her arms outstretched. Alice quickly moved to the other side of Bella and nodded in Tanya's direction.

"New shirt. Don't want it to get wrinkled."She said holding up her hand.

"Oh Allie, you're always buying something. Where'd you get it? It's so cute! We should totally go shopping together for some lingerie for the wedding night. I know a great spot back home and I could use some new stuff myself. Edwards already seen everything I have this week alone. Right babe?" Tanya turned to me smiling deviously and I knew what she was doing. Sure enough Bella's cheeks were bright red and everyone noticed it. Alice pushed her towards my mother who grabbed her hand and started to pull her from the kitchen.

"I'm sorry she's being so rude," I whispered to both of them on the way out.

"It happens. Don't worry about. Bad female behavior right?" Bella whispered back. My mother laughed under her breath then mentioned something about showing Bella to the guest bedroom.

"Did I say something wrong?" Tanya asked nonchalantly, popping a grape into her mouth. Alice sucked her teeth, walked over to me, and grabbed my shirt pulling me into the living room.

"Is everything okay Edward? Rose called and said you guys were arguing on the side of the highway. Talk to me."

"Alice you have enough to worry about. This weekend is about you and your wedding and that's all I really have the energy to deal with right now. If you need me I'll be in the cottage."

I walked out the front door to avoid the mockery that was my girlfriend, passed Emmett and Rose on their way in, and sprinted through the snow to my studio.

My instruments, my music, the **things** that mattered most to me were all in this room that seemed off limits to me. Pictures of my family lined one of the walls, the picture of me and Tanya that I had broken when I changed my major still hung in the center. I took it down….shoved it in between some boxes, and sat at my piano.

Closing my eyes, I tried to calm down as my fingers glided across the keys. I could feel myself melding with the spruce, the music wrapping me up and lifting me out of my body so that I felt like I was floating above everything. A melody began in my head…one that I didn't recognize but this is how it usually happened.

When I was out of my body was when the music came easily to me. It came in the form of colors and sounds and smells assaulting my senses, the result being something that came from the very depths of my soul.

The color brown sprang to my mind…warm and comforting wrapping around me…the tinkling of a laugh like little bells…bells…bells…Bella….and her kiss…her warm lips…her scent… her taste…and then the music really started to flow. It flowed out of my fingers and across the keys over and over again in a perfect melody. I quickly pushed away from my piano and grabbed blank sheet music. My fingers furiously copied the notes. It took all of an hour.

"Bella's Lullaby" I scrawled across the top of the page. And then I played it again. And again. And then a third time, committing it to memory, all the while letting images of her run through my mind. I was so engrossed in my song that I hadn't realized everyone had piled into the room and sat on the benches around me. Including her.

"Edward that was beautiful. Did you write that?" Alice asked me jumping from Jasper's lap.

"Uh…yea…I uh…just wrote it."

Alice's eyes glazed over as she sank on the bench beside me. "Mom and Dad are going to be so excited that you're composing again." She was practically bouncing on the seat beside me. "Play it again please."

"Go ahead man…we only caught the end of it but it sounds really good," Emmett said urging me on. I turned back to my piano and suddenly felt embarrassed. This song was my private ode to Bella. I couldn't play it with Tanya sitting next me. It just seemed wrong. That was until the scent of vanilla filled my nose.

"Beautiful Lullaby. I like the title. Would you play it again Edward? I'd really like to hear the whole thing." Bella's voice filtered through to my ears and my fingers began playing the song on their own accord.

I glanced over my shoulder periodically to gauge everyone's reactions. I knew their faces well enough to know when they were humoring me. It seemed that my song…Bella's song…had sparked something in the couples in the room. They were each held in their private loving moment. Alice had curled herself back into Jasper's lap, their foreheads touching while they stared into each others eyes. Emmet had his arms wrapped around Rosalie in front of him, his hands placed gently on her stomach, their cheeks gently rubbing against each others.

My eyes darted over to Tanya, to see if my song was affecting her in anyway what so ever. She wasn't even paying attention. She was texting, not even looking at me. Bella on the other hand was in tears. This was what I wanted. She…she was what I wanted whether I wanted to admit it or not.

"Edward that was really beautiful," Alice said when I was through.

"Thanks," I said quietly. I was torn between feeling guilty for writing it in the first place or angry that my girlfriend hadn't listened to a single note of it.

"Oh, it was alright. But you guys know how I feel about all this music crap. Please don't inflate his head. It's not you that's going to have to argue with him that he's wasting his time with it," Tanya said flatly eyeing each one of my siblings. "Really, it's not like anyone listens to that kind of music anymore." With that she glued her phone to her ear and left the room as if she hadn't just pissed on my parade.

"Don't listen to her Edward. She's an idiot. Always has been. I seriously wonder what you see in her," Emmett said shaking his head.

"I'm beginning to wonder myself." My eyes had followed her out the door and it wasn't until I felt Alice's hand on my shoulder that I turned back around.

"Edward…do you think that you could do something like that for the wedding…I know how your inspiration works so no pressure but I'd really love it…we'd really love it." She squeezed Jasper beside her and he nodded. "It would be an honor to dance our first dance as man and wife to something you composed Edward. I can't think of anything I'd rather have than that." Jasper added.

Alice shooed everyone out of the room insisting that I needed the time to work on her song.

"Bella could you stay?" I blurted before she stepped out of the room. Alice glanced back over her shoulder and pushed Bella into the room shutting the door behind her. Bella stood in the middle of the room with her hands in her back pockets rocking back and forth on her heels. The tension in the room seemed to be building with every breath we took.

"So…That song was beautiful, Edward."  
"I wrote it for you."  
"I don't know what to say."  
"You could start with you forgive me."

Her eyes hit the floor bringing me with them. I crawled over on my knees, backing her into the door. My hand found their resting place on the curve of her hips, hers curled over my shoulder. Both of us were shaking.

"For…forgive you…for what? You didn't do anything."

"For crossing the boundary Bella. For jeopardizing our friendship and kissing you. I'm-" She placed her fingers over her lips silencing me.

"Are you sorry that you kissed me? Because I'm not. I'm only sorry for the way that I reacted. I just freaked out. I ran…I ran because I never felt anything like that in my life. It was…scary. I thought I felt the earth move."  
"Yea…me too."

We laughed. We laughed and she slid on the floor sitting crossed legged in front of me holding my hands in her lap. I brought her hands up to my lips and kissed them and then I turned her hands over kissing her wrist. She leaned into me, her sleeves pushing up and I kissed up her forearm before pulling her into my arms. She wrapped her arms around my neck and I let her sweet smell wash over me.

"I missed you. It was the weirdest thing. I wanted to call…I was dying to call but I was afraid. I love Jacob and I don't want to hurt him and I knew that if I spoke to you I would want to see you…and if I saw you I would want to touch you…and if I touched you I would want to kiss you….and if I kissed you then…"

"Then we'd both be in trouble because I don't think I have the strength to stay away from you now."

Her lips crashed into mine. My mind blacked out the fact that my family was in the other room or that my girlfriend could walk in at any second. All I could think about was the feel of Bella's lips moving with mine, my hands running up the backs of her thighs as she leaned up on her knees. Her fingers wound tightly in my hair and she pulled my face away gasping for air. My lips ran along her jaw line to her neck. She leaned into me, moaning as I sucked the skin at the base of her neck and then we toppled backwards on the floor. She landed on top of me, breathing heavy and smiling.

"We're in trouble."

"Big trouble," I said rolling her over so that I was on top. She ran her fingers up through my hair sending shivers down my spine. We stared into each other's eyes for a moment and then she whispered "Kiss me." I leaned down; eager to feel her soft lips on mine again when I heard footsteps approaching. Her eyes opened wide and we scrambled apart, me jumping back up to the piano and her over to the wall where all my music books were.

"Uh, Bella…can you hand me the uh blue ball…book . The blue book," I stammered out just as Alice poked her head in the door.

"Um…Edward….mom wants us to come back up to the house for dinner. She sent me in here to get you guys."

"Where's Tanya?"  
"She went back up to the house already. You guys okay in here?" Bella nodded and guiltily ducked underneath Alice's arm. Alice eyed me suspiciously from the doorway. She looked at me and then over her shoulder and then back at me and laughed shaking her head.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing's funny really." She spun on her heels and in true Alice fashion, smirked over her shoulder and said, "Its just that I can see your boner from here."

The rest of the night was agonizing. Tanya continued to annoy everyone, Bella and I tried not to draw attention to the fact that we had just dry humped on my studio floor and my mother was frantically trying to make sure everyone ate enough. My father kept his eyes practically glued to me the whole time.

After dinner everyone piled into the living room going over stuff for the wedding. It was going to be at the house and we were trying to figure out where all decorations were going to go into the wee hours of the night. Everyone started dropping like flies one by one and each time my mother would gently wake them up and send them off to bed. Finally it was just me and my dad up and he had that "Lets talk" look on his face. 5.a.m is not a good time for serious conversation for me so I yawned dramatically and headed for the stairs.

Persistent as he is he followed. "Everything okay with you son?"

"Exhausted. Must sleep. Now." I tried to sound all cavemanish so he would get the point.

"Yea, I know…you look it. Take it easy. You're trying too hard." This stopped me in my tracks on the stairs causing him to bump into me.

"Trying too hard to do what?"

"Whatever it is that you're trying to do or trying not to do. We don't want you getting sick again. We just want you to be happy son, you know that. Whatever you choose to do with your life and who you choose to spend it with is completely up to you…but whatever you decide we hope that you follow your heart and not your brain. You know sometimes the two don't exactly work together."

I nodded and continued up the stairs letting his words sink into me. My father was a smart man; I should have known there was little that would get past him.

As I walked to my bedroom, my hand slid across the wall pushing the door to the guest bedroom slightly ajar as I passed.

Bella lay in the middle of the bed in a pair of sweat pants and a ratty looking t-shirt with the blankets at her feet like she had kicked them off. I tip toed in, carefully pulling them back over her. I let my lips gently brush her cheek and she sighed, relaxing back into the bed as if she had been waiting for that all night.

I turned to leave the room and closed the door but not before I heard "Edward" whispered from her lips.

* * *

**A/N So I hope you enjoyed all the kissy kissy face. I know you think they are probably a-holes for cheating but with significant others like theirs, wouldn't you? Like all good stories, things will get worse before they get better. But when its better, its gonna be awesome and extremely funny along the way. **

**So keep reading and enjoy this crazy ride because I'm gonna enjoy writing it for you people who are my readers that I love so much for being so awesome and supportive. Now go buy your ECLIPSE tickets so we can all watch Edward yell in Jacob's face and cream our seats...together. **

**BTW I have not slept in hours. **


	6. Back in your Head

**A/N I feel the need to add a little disclaimer in here. I don't own any of these characters or any of the songs the prelude the chapters...I do hope that you take a listen to them thought...**

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**Back in your Head**

_I just want back in your head…..I just want back in your head_

_I'm not unfaithful but I'll stray…when I get a little scared_

_When I get a little…Run Run Run….Run_

_Back in your head By Tegan and Sara_

**BPoV**

I dreamed of him. We were on the floor in his studio. His crystal green eyes stared into mine as he hovered over me, my thighs clenching his waist. His fingers danced across my bare skin as if I were his piano. His voice was low and velvety as he whispered in my ear. The whole time Jacob was standing on the other side of the glass, his hands and face pressed against it, watching. But he wasn't watching me. He was looking right over us…at Leah.

I woke up completely unnerved and remained that way for the rest of the morning. Only Esme appeared to have noticed, apologizing for me not sleeping well. Was it too cold in the room? Was the bed uncomfortable? I assured her that wasn't it. That I had never been able to sleep well in unfamiliar places.

"Well then we'll just have to make this a familiar place for you now wont we?"

She smiled, sliding pancakes onto my plate. I blushed, momentarily forgetting that although I had called Jacob three times he had yet to call me back. Edward looked up from his giant stack of pancakes and stared at Esme with his mouth hanging open, the half chewed food about to fall out.

"Edward, close your mouth dear. We're all having the same thing for breakfast. We don't need to see yours." She winked at him and flitted back over to the stove, the pan hissing as she poured more batter into it.

"Yeah Bella," Tanya piped in, "Maybe next time you could bring your boyfriend. Jacob is it?"She enunciated the syllables in his name as if she needed to remind me how to pronounce it. This time it was my turn to look surprised. I hadn't realized until that moment I hadn't mentioned him once…but then again where was the need. This wasn't "Meet Bella Social Hour".

"You will be bringing him to the wedding wont you? I mean I know you're part of the bridal party and all but who are you gonna dance with all night?" Rosalie raised her eyebrow at me, delicately forking a piece cantaloupe into her mouth. My cheeks started growing red as the room took on and uncomfortable silence. Rosalie had been so nice to me when we first met…what could have changed that? And then I looked at Edward and knew. He was staring down into his plate, pushing pancakes around in the syrup with a disappointed look on his face.

"I'm not much of a dancer so it wouldn't matter much to me but since you asked I had planned on bringing him", if he's not to busy to come I didn't add.

"Who wants more pancakes?" Esme chimed in breaking the tension in the room. I excused myself from the table, feigning that I needed to call said boyfriend. As I walked back up the stairs I glanced back over my shoulder, my eyes taking in the sight of this tight nit family. Both Tanya and Rose had these triumphant looks on their faces, something I would probably have to watch out for. The thought occurred to me that although I was Alice's friend…the Cullen family was in their own little world. One that I couldn't ever dream to be a part of. I had my own world I needed to get home to no matter how dark and dismal it was becoming.

I had seen Emmett truck fly past me on the highway. Edwards shiny Volvo speeding past it, followed by Jasper's shiny black Acura. My truck crawled along the interstate. Another reminder that I was fooling myself. The night before Edward and I were almost caught on the floor of his studio kissing, today he'd barely said three words to me…avoided any eye contact whatsoever…was barely in the same room with me.

Hot and cold…Just the way Jacob had become.

By the time I reached home I felt emotionally exhausted. I wanted to call Edward…ask him why he was acting so weird all of a sudden…tell him his moods swings were gonna give me whiplash but what was the point? He was going home with his bitch of a girlfriend and I was climbing the stairs to…God knows what.

Jacob was asleep on the couch when I walked in. His thick dark hair hung off the side of the couch, the light gleaming off it. He looked peaceful with his arm thrown across his forehead and his lips slightly parted as he breathed in and out.

I missed him. I missed his warmth. I missed his smile. I hadn't seen it all week.

_Why didn't you tell me you lost your internship?_

It wasn't just me Jacob…they let go of everyone. Besides I didn't want you to stress about it.

Not stress about? Bella we have bills to pay…my car needs parts…and you want to spend all this money on Alice's wedding…where is your brain at right now?

Jacob we're fine with money. We barely go out anymore so everything I made I've been saving.

Bella, you need to go back to work.

I don't want to. I don't need to right now. Besides I want spend some time on my book…I haven't been able to write anything between school and work…

Your book…right…okay Bella…you stay home…I'll carry us…everything always falls on me anyway right. Jacob fix my car. Jacob clean the house. Jacob I need to study you make dinner...do the laundry…Are you wearing the skirt or am I?

And then he left. Didn't tell me where he was going. Came home at three in the morning smelling of beer and apologizing for yelling…telling me he was sorry he was just stressed at work. Stressed that he hadn't gotten things together for school in time. That he hated it out here in Seattle and wanted to move back to the rez…that he missed being with his family…Like I wasn't family.

Tears welled in my eyes and I sank to the floor on the other side of the coffee table, my head resting on my arm as I sobbed quietly. We used to be close and now we were just drifting apart and while I should have been focusing on reeling us back in, I was kissing Edward and then feeling like shit when he didn't talk to me the next day.

"Bella, why are you crying?" Jacob's sleepy voice broke through my cries and I lifted my head but kept my eyes down. I couldn't look at him.

"I'm upset obviously. Things are bad Jacob…I can feel it. I feel like I'm losing you and it scares me…I don't know what I'm doing wrong…I'm trying my best…but I don't know what to do anymore."

Jacob came around the table and wrapped his arms around me. He ran his fingers through my hair and pressed his face against my cheek. I could feel his breath, warm from sleep, crawling across my skin. I leaned into him more, wanting to bury myself in his clothes. I couldn't lose him…I'd have nothing if I did.

'Bella…come on…you're being dramatic. We had a bad week…It happens. We've be together for years."

"But this is what happens…you either go up or down Jacob…and it feels like we're going down. It feels like your slipping right between my fingers and falling into someone else's hands."

Jacob pulled back, looking me in the eye, his expression changing from one of sympathy to irritation. "Is this about Leah again?"

"Not entirely."

"Bella how many times do I have to tell you there's nothing going on between us? She just needs a friend right now. That's all. A friend."

"But I need you Jacob. Remember me? Your girlfriend of four years."

"Exactly Bella. Four years. When have I ever given you a reason not to trust me?"

"Never," I mumbled under my breath. I looked up into his eyes. He looked like he always did…brown eyed and loving. Maybe I was projecting. You know what they say…Cheaters always accuse the one's they're with of cheating to hide their own guilt.

"See, now stop it." I sniffled and he tipped my chin up with his index finger, kissing me softly and quickly on the lips. "I'll tell you what…why don't we do something week. Just me and you. We'll go out like we used to. See a movie or dinner or something. Maybe go for a walk, have a snowball fight?"

I nodded as he moved his hands to cup my cheek. I could feel the warmth spreading over my face and down my chest. I felt like it had been eons since had felt him touch me so tenderly. I moved forward turning his lap so that I was straddling his waist. I kissed his forehead, between his eyes, his nose finally his lips, just as I had done the first time we had sex. Jacob pulled my legs around his waist, using the table to pull himself up. He walked steadily to our bedroom, his lips running along my collar bone and I clutched him tightly pushing myself into him.

This was where I needed to be. In the familiar hands of the man that I loved no matter how good it felt to have Edward touch me. I loved Jacob, needed him, wanted him. Wanted to be on his mind again, wanted those phone calls and texts in the middle of the day just to say love you…or can't wait until I get home to see you.

Jacob slid me onto the bed, leaning up to take his shirt off. There was an angry red mark on his chest. I reached up to run my hand over it, opened my mouth to ask what it was but he grabbed my wrist pulling my palm to his mouth. His other hand palmed between my legs, the pressure hitting in all the right places, and I moaned grinding into him. He leaned forward pressing his lips to mine roughly, pushing my higher on the bed and ripping my shirt open at the same time. I tangled my fingers into his hair, my breath coming out in pants as his lips sucked at my skin with every kiss.

I left lifted my hips from the bed, letting him roll my jeans down. He pulled his own pants down, sliding back between my legs. I could feel him, hard and pulsing. My mouth began to water with need and I pressed against him, rocking gently just to feel him. He groaned, grabbing a handful of my hair and pulled my head back. His hand slipped between us, my panties were pulled down and fire danced on my skin as he ran his hand back up my thigh. I felt his hand go between us again and braced myself when I felt him aligning himself with my opening. I pulled my legs back, giving him more room and felt him push. The initial pain bled into pleasure making me cry out. I loved that feeling…when Jacob and I became one person…

I clutched him to me, moaning as his hips rocked into me over and over. My lips sought his out but he turned his head away keeping his face buried in my neck. His breath was hot on my skin, growing uncomfortable so I pushed him so he'd roll over. He gripped my hips firmly, letting me adjust to the new position and then something just felt weird. I looked down at him, his eyes were closed and he was biting down on his bottom lip. He moved his hands to my ass squeezing it…but I could tell it was a waste of time. I could feel him growing soft inside of me. My eyes started to water, I turned my head way so he wouldn't see but when I did a single tear fell from my eye and I knew where it landed with out having to look…right on his face.

"Bella…don't cry…Do not cry…I'm sorry okay…I'm just tired that's all."

My body started to shake and I tried to pull away but he held me tight not letting me move. I could feel his limp cock beneath me, fat and sluggish and I felt disgusting…I had done that to him. He looked up and saw me… and then lost wood.

"Jacob, just let me go. Please." I whispered. I could feel him shaking his head.

"Bella look at me. I'm tired. I was sleep when you got home. This doesn't mean anything. It happens okay."  
"Sure sure." 

I leaned all my weight sideways, falling on the bed beside him, curling into fetal position. He curled his body behind me, he hand running up my legs and around my thigh. I felt his fingers slide between my legs, searching for the spot that made all my muscles tense up. I clenched my legs together so he couldn't move. I wasn't in the mood anymore.

"Come one Bells. Let me finish you off at least."

"No, you're tired remember. Why don't you just go back to sleep if I can't keep you awake."

"Bella you're being ridiculous. Turn around and look at me."

"Leave me alone."

"Bella."

"Jacob."

Jacob gripped my arm roughly and pulled me on my back. I was startled for a moment but didn't get a chance to yell at him. Jacob smother my mouth with his, pulling away only when I stopped breathing.

"Would you stop it? I love you okay. Now just relax. Fucking relax. You're gonna drive us both nuts." He smiled that ear to ear smile at me and climbed off my lap pulling me up with him.

"Go take a shower and then come back to bed. I'm tired tonight, but I'll wake you up nicely in the morning okay. He kissed my forehead, slapped my ass, and all but pushed me out the door.

I tried to sleep light that night, naked, hoping to feel Jacob's hand stirring me awake by brushing along the curve of my body the way he used to. Instead I woke up in a puddle of my own drool, the pillows pulled over my head blocking out all the sun. I reached over, patting the bed beside me, hoping that I had just woken up before him, that he hadn't forgotten. He wasn't there but I could hear music blaring from the other room.

I groaned, reaching for my mobile from the night stand. Three missed calls and 5 unread texts. One voicemail. I pressed the phone to my ear, pulling the blanket around me.

_1 new voicemail. Time 3:30 a.m. Sunday._

Heavy breathing, someone swallowing…gulping more like it. "Bella…hey it's me…Um…It's um…it's Edward. I want to…no I…I need to…talk…to you. Please…call me as soon as you get this…or you know whenever you can. Please."

Just as I was about to press the call back button, Jacob stepped into the room carrying a tray with food and a little plastic flower on it.

"Damn, you're awake already. I wanted to surprise you."

"I'm surprised," I said staring at my phone though it wasn't the breakfast in bed that I was referring to.

"Who were you talking to?" Jacob placed the tray over my lap taking the phone from my hand at the same time. "That thing was going off all night. I was gonna answer it for you but you were sleeping so hard I didn't want to have to wake you if were Alice of something."

I snatched it back from him knowing he was about to read the texts I hadn't seen yet. "You're right. It was Alice. I'll call her later. Are you staying home to day?" I looked up at him, slipping the phone between me and the tray. He eyed me warily picking my glass of juice off the table and sipped it.

"No _we're _going out. We have errands to run."

"But its Sunday."

"Grocery stores are open on Sundays. And so is auto zone. A part I ordered came in. We need to go get it. Eat, take a shower, and after we drop the food off we can so see a movie okay." Jacob cupped my face in his hand and leaned forward to kiss the top of my head.

I nodded but my hands were shaking. I wanted to read the texts. I wanted to call and hear Edward's voice. And it made me feel like shit…because Jacob was smiling at me like he used to. But still the butterflies were swarming in my stomach so much that I couldn't eat. I nibbled at the food while Jacob and I made small talk. He wanted to go to the mall and get something nice to wear to the wedding and reminded me that I still hadn't found a gift for Alice and Jasper yet.

We spent the rest of the morning cleaning the apartment. I forgot all about the phone calls and the texts, focusing only on the way Jacob's smile was brightening up the house. We stopped by the mall walking hand in hand the entire time we were together. Jacob hated going in to the stores like Victoria's Secret because the girls always stared at him while I tried stuff on, so I let him roam while I shopped. I spent a half hour looking for something that screamed Alice but couldn't find anything. Instead I ended up buying something for myself…well for Jacob really.

After the mall we stopped by the Grocery store. Jacob seemed distracted. Distracted enough not to notice when I froze in the middle of the parking lot, my knuckles turning white as I gripped the handle on the shopping cart as we passed the silver Volvo.

It couldn't be….all this time we lived in the same city without running into each other…Lots of people drove Volvo's…they were good family cars.

I caught up with Jacob who had walked ahead of me staring at his phone. He cast a sideways glance at me, the light that had been in eyes all morning gone.

"Jacob is everything okay?" I was even more shaken now than before.

"Yea. Everything fine. Would you stop worrying please?" He yanked the cart from my hand pushing ahead of me. I had to jog to keep up with him.

Cold. Again. It was driving me crazy. I wrapped my arms around myself to keep from shaking. We were having such a good day. What happened….what had happened…what had I done wrong?

We shopped in silence. I got bored with the quiet, watching him pick between salad dressing…bottles of barbecue sauce. Who gave a shit about what condiments we used when our relationship was crumbling right before our eyes?

I started to get angry when I brushed up against him and he jerked away like I had poked him with a cattle prod.

"Jacob what the hell?"

"I asked you what kind of cereal you wanted. What the matter?"

"Why are you acting like this?"

"Like I care about what kind of cereal you want? I don't know…maybe because you have to eat it too. Wait hold on a minute."

He held up his hand, stopping me from speaking, and pulled his phone out of his pocket. I hadn't even heard it ring which meant he was keeping it on vibrate now. He pressed the phone to his ear, breathing a hello and I wanted to snatch it and stomp it to pieces. The smile that was on his face was undeniable. And then he just turned and walked away from me…exited the aisle stage left.

My knees startled to shake and I gripped the shopping cart for support as I speechlessly watched him walk away. I closed my eyes, swallowed hard, and tried to breathe. That was proof…what more did I need. It didn't matter who he was talking to…everyone….everything was more important than me.

I didn't hear the footsteps coming up behind me…but I smelled the cologne. It calmed me. My knees stop shaking, but I kept my eyes closed just a moment longer as he gently put his hand over my shoulder.

"Bella?" His voice was soft when he said my name. Like a whisper. I didn't want to turn around. I wanted him to think I hadn't heard him so he'd say it again.

"Bella, are you alright?" This time he turned me gently, not roughly like Jacob had done. He tilted my head up toward his and I slowly opened my eyes. His green eyes sparkled in the fluorescent lights making my heart pound. He was so beautiful.

"There you are."

But I was supposed to be mad at him so I jerked away.

"Why didn't you call me back? Did I…did he know I was calling you? I didn't know if I should but then I had to. I needed to explain," he stammered out. His smile was gone. He looked sad that I was angry with him. Well he should. I was tired of getting strung along by people. I didn't deserve it.

"Explain what? That you like to play games with people's heads? That you like to prey on vulnerable people?"

He laughed. A breathy embarrassed laugh and ran his fingers through his hair. "No…not at all. I wanted to explain to you that my parents know. They are far too observant for anyone's good. You can imagine what it was like growing up and trying to do anything sneaky behind their backs…they always have this way of just knowing."

"Know what Edward? What are you talking about?"

"My parents like you Bella. I can tell. They'll love you if you let them. I want them to."

"Why? I don't understand. You wrote that song…and what you said…when we kissed…and then you just don't say anything to me at all. You didn't even say good bye when I left."

The tears were flooding my eyes now but I could still see him smiling through the haze.

"I want them to love you because I know I will. And I was nervous. It's weird to have someone tell you how you're gonna feel before you feel it but know that they are right. I can't stop thinking about you Bella and it's wrong I know because we're both in relationships…but you…your eyes….your beautiful brown eyes…I cant get them out of my mind."

Edward reached for my hand and I let him take it. What he was saying seemed far too serious to be spoken surrounded by boxes of cereal but that wasn't what I was focusing on. I was too busy having an out of body experience watching him raise my hand to his mouth and then being thrown back into my body when his lips pressed against my skin.

"Please don't be cross with me Bella," he murmured into my hand. My skin started to tingle. I took a step closer to him and he looked up at me from under his lashes, his lips still on my hand.

"Edward…I…don't…hurt me. Please."

"I would never. That's the last thing I want to do."

"What's the first thing?"

He chuckled bring our hands down between us. His smile made me smile. I forgot about being upset. The Cullens could do that…they all had these warm beautiful smiles that seemed to erase away the bad and you could only see the good. Alice could always do it…Esme had done it…and Edward... he made me feel things I couldn't explain.

"I don't know. Maybe take a walk with you. Take you to a movie or something like that." And then his phone started to ring but he ignored it. Reached in his pocket and silenced it, waiting for me to respond.

"I'd like that Edward."

"Good…then lets go."

"Now?"

"Yes now…why not now? Now is perfect. We're here now. We should go now."

"But Jacob?"

"But Jacob what? I saw what he just did to you…let him worry. It'll be good for him."

Edward had this mischievous look in his eyes that sent the blood rushing to my face. He ran his thumb across my cheek and I shuddered at his touching, reaching up for his hand. What I was about to do was crazy…but that's how my life felt at the moment…crazy…and I wanted it to be crazy good. I pulled his hand down and we nodded at each other, simultaneously, on the same page and then I followed him to the end of the aisle. We peeked around the corner and there was Tanya in front of the freezer section staring at cases of beer. She must have felt us watching her because she looked over her shoulder and he pushed me back out of sight.

"This is so bad Edward. What are we doing?"

"Having a little fun for once." He laughed and then started humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song as we pretended to sneak to the other end of the aisle but then there was Jacob.

"Agent Swan I think we're trapped. The only way out is to make a run for it."

"But Agent Cullen…we're surrounded on all sides."

"It's a good thing I'm a fast runner then." And then he did something I would have never expected in a million years. He grinned at me and the next thing I knew he swung me onto his back and bolted right past Jacob and out the door. He ran, the cold air whipping at my face, past his car and my car and then out of the parking lot. He put me down when we were out of sight and bent over laughing hard.

I had never felt so alive in my life. I laughed so hard I thought I would piss myself and leaned against a tree trying to catch my breath. Our eyes met and we smiled at each other like we had just won prizes and then as if our brains were linked, we stepped close together and slipped our hands into each other and started to walk.

It was cold and the wind was blowing. After about ten minutes we both realized this was a stupid idea but neither of us would say it. We just kept walking. Edward pulled me close to him and wrapped his arms around my shoulders and I wrapped mine around his waist and we walked until we found a little café. It was to cold to speak but no words were needed. Our feet turned at exactly the same time and we bolted towards the café, shivering as we stepped inside.

"You're crazy aren't you?" I asked him when we sat down. He smiled a sexy half-smile and lifted his hand miming "a little" with his thumb and index finger.

"But the good kind of crazy. Not the boil your pet rabbit on the stove kind."

"The good kind? When is there ever a good kind of crazy?"

"When it helps you breathe." Edward put his hand on my chest, careful not to touch my breast thought I wanted him to. I could feel warmth through my clothes but I wanted to feel it for real…with nothing in between. I inhaled and exhaled hard, hanging my head and letting my hair fall around my face like a curtain as I covered his hand with mine. He scooted closer to me and put his other arm around my shoulder pulling me forward so I would rest my head against him. I breathed in his scent; letting it fill my lungs and help me breathe...I just wanted to breathe him for the rest of my life.

"Bella, I may have been wrong and I'm sorry. If you want I'll kick his ass for you. Even if I was right. No one should treat you that way and I'm sorry if I upset you too. You don't need me making things worse, but what I'm feeling for you. It scares me. I've been with Tanya for years…She drives me crazy, makes me wanna choke her out sometimes but I feel indebted to her. I know everyone wonders why I'm still with her even though she treats me like shit and there's a reason that no one else has been able to understand."

"What's the reason?" I didn't want to lift my head. I was too comfortable where I was. Even though he was all but telling me he wouldn't leave her, I didn't want to be anywhere else.

"I almost killed her."

That got my attention. I popped my head up, hitting him in the chin. He backed away, his eyes shut tight and I meant to apologize but what came out in a screech was –

"You almost killed her? What the hell do you mean you almost killed her?"

Edward looked around nervously for a minute and then turned back to me with his finger over his lips, telling me to be quiet.

"It's not what you think. I didn't hurt her or anything like that." He grabbed my hands and pulled them into my lap as the waiter came over placing our mugs on the table and eyed us both with his eyebrows raised. Edward nodded at the waiter, sending him away and then slowly put my cup in my hand to stop it from trembling.

"I met Tanya at a benefit dinner back when I was in like the 7th grade. Her father worked with my father and they would come to the house a lot. She went to private school but we were studying the same thing so we would do our homework together and sometimes I would tutor her. After a while we just got close and everyone just assumed we'd end up together but I never really wanted to be more than friends. She's a beautiful girl but she's never been my type."

When he said this he ran his finger through my hair, rolling my ends between his fingers.

"It just seemed like the natural thing to do at the time. My brother and sister were both paired off and both of us could see it coming. We kind of just fell into this relationship. But then I got sick and that's when everything changed."

Edward had this look on his face like he was tasting rancid milk and started to turn away from me. I tugged on his shirt and pulled him back, worry filling my face.

"I…and you wont believe this…some how contracted the Spanish flu. It was an anomaly. Nobody had any idea how or where I had gotten it. But I was dying and Tanya…she wouldn't leave my side…so naturally she caught it from me. But as I was getting better she was only getting worse. It got to the point were she was really on the brink of death and I cried. It was the first time since I was a kid that I had cried…when my parents told me that I could die I didn't care…I was asking them if they would be okay without me…but when I saw her…so weak…It tore me up. I told her that if she lived…if she lived for me I would stay with her forever. That when were older I would marry her…give her everything she wanted…she just had to pull through. Within days her fever broke…and here we are."

Edward sat back against the seat and I could see the gears turning in his head. I didn't know what to say anyway so I nestled against him and rested my head on his shoulder. Edward began stroking my cheek with his thumb and slumped down in the seat resting his face against the top of my head.

"But now it doesn't seem like enough anymore. We were happy in the beginning but in my spoiling her she actually spoiled. I keep flipping back and forth between giving up and wanting to just take her away and fix her but now," he tipped my face up and looked into my eyes, "now there are too many other things that I want to do that involve you."

"I know how you feel. I feel guilty but at the same… but there isn't any place I'd rather be right now."

"Good. Because I'm quite content myself. There's only one thing that would make this moment better."

"What's that?"

"Let me kiss you."

He didn't have to ask me twice. I turned quickly in his arms and he pulled me closer and pressed his lips to my forehead. I felt his kiss travel in waves down to the very tips of my toes. Edward lowered his face, pressed his lips to mine softly at first. Fireworks started going off in my head. I let my hand crawl up the smooth hard planes of his chest and the back down to his stomach. It was soft. I laughed into his mouth and he bit my bottom lip chuckling with me because I started poking his beer gut.

"Way to ruin the moment Swan," he chided me with a smirk on his face. I could feel myself glowing… cheesing … being happy. I didn't want it to end.

"It was only a moment. There will be plenty of other perfect ones."

"You mean ones like this?" Edward grabbed me quickly by the waist and pulled me into his lap. I giggled as he nuzzled his face in the crook of my neck. Laughed out loud when his fingertips crawled up my spine. Kissed him when his glittering green eyes smiled at me.

We stayed like that for an hour just talking and kissing and smiling at each other like teenagers. After it was clear we were pissing off everyone else in the café, Edward called us a cab and went to the movies. I don't remember what movie we saw. We spent the entire time staring at each other and kissing softly, memorizing each others faces in the dark. After the movie we took a taxi back to my apartment. I looked up at my building, could see that the living room light was on and Jacob's silhouette passing back and forth past the window.

"How angry do you think he'll be?" Edward's hand was clasped around mine stopping me before I climbed out the taxi.

"Who knows…he may not have even noticed I was gone." I chuckled nervously feeling my stomach twisting into knots. Jacob was going to be furious, I knew that much.

"Bella, I'll stay if you want. Until I know you're okay."

"No Edward its okay. You have your own to deal with. I can handle Jacob."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive Edward."

"Well I'll leave my phone on. If you need me just call. I'll come right back and get you if I need to."

I nodded and scooted closer to him so that I could be sure Jacob wouldn't seem me when I kissed him goodbye.

Edward tangled his fingers in my hair and parted my lips slowly with his. I could feel his breath warm on my face as he deepened the kiss. I opened my mouth to him, his warm tongue dancing with mine. The heat flushed to my face and I leaned more into him, kissing him harder, wanting to crawl into his lap. My knee brushed over his lap and he hissed pulling back and panting.

"Okay….that's enough for now. If you don't go now I'll never let you go."

"I don't think I'd mind so much." I slid my hand along his thigh but he stopped me and nodded towards the door laughing.

"Go Bella. If I don't hear from you tonight I'll speak to you tomorrow." He kissed me quickly on the lips again and I scrambled from the cab feeling like was floating on air. I hadn't had that much fun, felt that good in too long.

It was a good thing someone was coming out of the building just as I got to the door. Jacob had my keys. I waved goodbye to Edward over my shoulder, watched as the taxi pulled away and walked upstairs. In the back of my mind I knew I should feel bad but I couldn't…I wouldn't let anything ruin what I just had. I was smiling so hard it actually hurt but composed myself before I walked in the apartment.

All the lights were off except the one in the living room. I stopped in the doorway and took off my coat before I actually looked to see where he was. Jacob was sitting in his armchair, his elbows on his knees, head in his hands, fingers curled in his hair. My mobile, his mobile, and our cordless phone were lined up in front of him on the floor. He was sniffling. I could hear it.

"Do you have any idea how badly you scared me?" His voice was ragged and rough. He tried to sound angry but I could hear the hurt…but didn't care. I took a deep breath and leaned against the doorway, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Good for you. You needed it."

"No Bella. I didn't need it. No one needs that. What were you thinking? Where the hell did you go? You've been gone for hours."

"For a walk. And then I went to the movies." At least I didn't lie completely.

"You just leave…just walk out of the damn grocery and leave me going crazy. I though someone kidnapped you Bella." His voice cracked and he still hadn't raised his face to me.

"Like you did to me. We were having such a good day Jacob…and then you just switched gears on me. I can't do this hot and cold with you anymore. It's tiring. It hurts."

"I'm not being hot and cold with you Bella. I'm human. I make mistakes…get distracted. Cut me some slack okay!"

I huffed and turned towards the kitchen. He didn't need slack. He needed a swift kick in the ass. I could hear his footsteps coming up behind me but didn't turn around. It was my turn to not look him in the eye.

"Bella. You've gotta stop punishing me for stuff I'm not doing. This is the second time you've just disappeared on me."

"Yes…because this is the second time you've given me a reason to Jacob. I know it was Leah that called you. I'm not stupid…and Sue's party…I saw the way you looked at her. I'm not stupid Jacob. You can deny it all you want but it's there. I know it is."

There was a crash behind me and I flinched gripping the counter. I turned just as Jacob came to stand before me and saw that he had knocked over one of the kitchen chairs. He grabbed me by my waist, picking me up, and plopping me on the counter. He grabbed my face roughly between his hands forcing me to look at him.

"Bella. There is nothing between Leah and I. I'm not going to tell you again. You have got to stop this. It's you Bella. You're doing this to us. You're pushing me away with your accusations. Can't you see that?"

I bit into my bottom lip, stifling my tears. Jacob stared into my eyes but I saw nothing. No sincerity…nothing. It sickened me. How could someone sit there and lie in your face with such conviction.

"I can see a lot of things Jacob. But that's not one of them."

I pushed his hands away, pushed him away and hopped down off the counter. He followed me into the bedroom. Sat on the edge of the bed while I pulled pajamas out of my drawer. His eyes pierced though me as I twisted my hair up into a ponytail and when I turned around they were glassy. He fell to his knees in front of me and grabbed at my waist but I backed away.

"I'm sorry."

"For?" I held my breath. I had an inclination but to actually hear him say the words would crush me.

"For hurting you. I'm sorry. I don't want you to hurt over me Bella. I'm not supposed to hurt you."

"Then stop. Whatever it is that you're doing just stop. Be who you were…for one goddamn minute…be MY Jacob again."

I walked past him through the living room to the bathroom, snatching my phone off the floor as I passed. Alice had called and I would have called her back but I didn't feel like talking to anyone. I ran a bath and took my clothes off piece by piece in the mirror like I was stripping off layers of hurt.

I would always love Jacob but sometimes love wasn't enough. Sometimes love hurt and this love hurt. I didn't want to hurt anymore. I wanted to be happy. I wanted the smiling until my face hurt. I wanted the butterflies in my stomach, the blood rushing to the surface of my skin with every touch.

I wanted Edward.

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**A/N Hope you guys enjoyed that...It enjoyed writing it...Sometimes i love a little drama...**


	7. Splite me Wide Open

**A/N So I know its been while since I updated so i made this chapter long to make up for it. I hope everyone enjoys it!**

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****Split me Wide Open**

_Is nothing sacred, is nothing saved?...Your gentle eyes like a razor blade  
_

_They cut me open, you look right through…I give it all to you  
_

_Split me wide open, and cut it at all…My hands on your body like a blind man's on a wall  
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_Oh you always show me, you're the only one who shows me  
_

**_Split me Wide Open by The Bravery _**

**EPoV**

Days after our spontaneous date Bella sat across the table in what became "our" café with her hands clasped in her lap, her eyes glued to the floor, and her bottom lip clenched beneath her teeth. I had just finished telling her about the epic tantrum Tanya had thrown when I got back to the apartment that night when her chocolate eyes flickered up to mine and then shot back to the floor.

"It's okay Bella. I'm used to her tantrums. She throws one anytime she hears the word no come out of my mouth," I told her reassuringly but the guilty expression on her face didn't change.

"You know I'm not a mind-reader right? What's the matter?" I reached over pushing her hair back behind her ear so she couldn't hide her face from me anymore.

"It's just that I'm sorry that you had to go through that. Sure Jake was angry but he didn't throw things at me. He didn't try to hurt me," Bella said softly turning to me and running her fingers along the scratches on my arm Tanya had given me when I told her to go to her fathers for night.

"Trust me she's done worse. This is nothing."

"That doesn't make me feel better. Especially when…" her voice trailed off and her eyes sank back to the floor. I watched her take a few breaths waiting for her to speak but all she did was bite her lip again.

"When what?"

"Jake says he wants to try harder…you know…with us." She blurted it out so fast and so softly I had to strain to hear her.

"You don't sound too enthused," I said just as softly voicing my own feelings. Those few short hours I had spent with Bella were some of the best I had had in a while. I was looking forward to have more "perfect moments" with her.

"No…it's not that. I just…I don't know if I can trust him. I mean how many times has he said that? But I feel like I owe it to him to give him the benefit of the doubt you know…no matter how much I _want_ other…things."

I jumped when her hand slid underneath the table and squeezed my thigh. She raised her eyes to me and I could see it…what she wanted.

"Bella," I whispered covering her hand with mine so she'd leave it on my leg, "You don't owe him anything. How long are you going to punish yourself? You deserve better and you know it."

"You're one to talk," she bit back. "How long are you going to blame yourself for something you had no control over?"

"Bella I didn't mean to offend you. I'm on your side here. I just want you to be happy that's all."

She pulled her hand from beneath mine and curled her fingers in my hair pulling our foreheads together until they touched and exhaled letting her pomegranate breath wash over my face.

"Oh Edward, if only I had a magic wand…I make everything right for both of us."

The simple solution to both of our problems was hanging on the tip of my tongue waiting to be spoken but was interrupted by Bella's mobile ringing. She picked it up sitting back in her seat and within 5 minutes was saying goodbye. Jacob had come home from work early and had expected to see her there waiting for him. Her eyes were sorry when she got up from the table and she left me with her kiss burning on my forehead.

I didn't see her again until the weekend of the wedding.

When I walked into my parent's house she sped past me, waving hello quickly with a roll of satin trailing behind her.

"Bella! You're dragging it on the floor! Pick it up! Pick it up!" Alice screamed from the living room window.

"Oh Alice it's going on the floor anyway! What does it matter?" Rosalie yelled back at her grabbing the satin runner off the floor and throwing it over her shoulder.

"This place is a mad house," Emmett rumbled next to me from the stairs. "If I were you I'd turn around and come back later. Say you got stuck in traffic or something."

Alice appeared in front of us out of nowhere shooting daggers from her eyes. "Oh no you don't! You're already late. Get your ass in there and help Jasper move the furniture…both of you!" She grabbed Emmett's shirt and pulled him off the stairs pushing me right behind him.

The living room where the wedding was to be held looked like a mini tornado had run through it and its name was Alice. Emmett, Jasper, and I set to work moving all the furniture out of way and placing the runners and chairs. Despite all our manual labor Jasper was all smiles and Emmett teased him relentlessly about not having a bachelor party.

"Still can't stand up to my little sister hunh? You know it's only gonna get worse after you're actually married right? You sure you want to go through with this?"

"As sure as I've ever been of anything and I'll have you know it was a mutual decision not to have parties. For one thing you get us into too much trouble," Jasper answered him laughing.

"I do not. I just make sure we have a good time that's all!"

"Um…I'm sorry to inform you Emmett but spending the night of my 21st birthday in a drunk tank with hoboes wasn't exactly my idea of fun," I mocked.

"Hey, how was I supposed to know you'd be such a light weight? And it wasn't my fault Jasper punched that hooker in the face."

"That hooker was a man and he grabbed my junk!"

"Emmett…you pissed on a cop car…while he was in it. I think that may have been what did us in."

The three of us cracked up laughing and Jasper and I spent the next hour reminding Emmett of all the reasons he should never be allowed to throw party.

The rest of the day past quickly with getting everything set up and Alice the terrible shouting orders at us. Surprisingly she had even gotten Tanya to help but from the way she was screaming at her she wasn't much help at all. By night fall everyone was exhausted and looking forward to hanging out around the bonfire my parents set up. For a February night it was surprisingly warm out. The full moon filled the backyard with its blue light and Jasper and I whipped out acoustics while Emmett passed the beers around.

It felt good to have Dahlia in my hands again. Next to my baby grand she felt like another extension of my arm. Jasper and I played a few songs until my parents kissed us all goodnight and excused themselves. While I waited for Emmett to and Rose to return with out "party" coolers, I absentmindedly started strumming a song while looking at Alice and Jasper completely lost in my thoughts of how I couldn't have picked a better husband for her. They were both positively glowing and it was in that moment that I began to feel flickers of envy. They reminded me of what my parents must have looked like at our age. I wanted what they had too.

"Alright Bella, this is your first official Cullen family bonfire and as tradition you need to be initiated," Emmett said standing in front of her.

"Initiated?" She croaked out turning to Alice. "Why do I get the feeling that this is going to be very bad?"

"It won't be _very_ bad," she snickered. "But since you are the newbie…and Emmett approached you first…it could potentially be very bad…for you…hilarious for us…but soooo bad for you."

"Some friend you are for not warning me," she scoffed with a smile on her face. "Alright Emmett what's the initiation?"

"Oooh…someone's got a pair on her. You hear this guys?" Emmett turned to us smiling that devilish grin he does when he's thinking of something that could get us all arrested.

"What ever you're planning I'm sure I can take it. Bring it on Cullen."

Jasper and I both "ooohed" at the same time and started playing suspenseful music while Emmett paced back and forth drinking his beer. He passed her a few times, each time locking his eyes on her beautiful brown ones then stopped suddenly turning back to look at Tanya then at Bella again.

"Okay Swan…we're gonna play a little game see," Emmett sneered trying to sound villainous. He reached up curling his invisible mustache and wiggled his eyebrows at her. "And the name of the little game is Truth or dare."

Bella blinked twice and the busted out in a fit of laughter. Alice had to grab her before she fell backwards off the log.

"Truth or Dare? That's the best you got?" she laughed trying to catch her breath. The rest of us just looked at each other shaking our heads. Poor Bella had no idea what she was getting herself into.

"Rules of the game are as follows: You must answer any and all truth questions 100% truthfully or suffer the consequences of drinking a whole beer. Should you choose not answer a question the punishment is to drink no matter how drunk you already are. As for the dare…should you chose not to do it, it's the beer funnel for you." Emmett smirked at her plopping down on my other side.

"That doesn't sound too bad to me? What's the big deal?" she asked looking around at us completely oblivious to the actual point of Emmett's little game.

"Oh…just wait. We'll let you watch a few first so you get the hang of it m'kay." He winked at her and then turned his attention to Tanya who, from the look on her face, was burning every cell in her brain to think of something horrible to do to Bella. For a moment I almost wished she hadn't opened her mouth and challenged him.

"Okay Tanya. Truth or dare?" Emmett asked her putting a fresh beer in her hand. We were all silent waiting for her answer. She smirked at him and said "Truth."

"Have you ever had sex with anyone besides my brother?"

A gush of beer went flying from her mouth into his face. "No!"

A sinking feeling started weighing down on me as I stared into her face. Guilty Guilty Guilty was written all across it. I narrowed my eyes at her while she blabbered on about how they all knew I was the only person she'd ever been with. She was only digging herself into a bigger hole.

Emmett's eyes were narrowed at her as well. He reached down beside his leg and pulled another beer tossing it into her lap.

"I not drinking that!" she screamed at him and threw it back. I smacked it out of the way right before it hit him in the face.

"Okay…okay…If Tanya says she hasn't then I believe her. Don't antagonize her Emmett. That's not fair." Rose slid onto the log beside him with her eyes locked on my face. I could see it in her eyes that she didn't believe her either.

"Okay…let's move on. This is Bella's first game…let's not spoil it for her," I said quickly trying to change the subject. In the back of my mind I was planning on killing them both later.

"Okay Emmett since you want to play hard ball…Did you or did you not let my friend Kate give you a blowjob at my birthday party last year?" Tanya said challenging him.

"I sure did and she's rubbish at it by the way."

Rose's face flushed green and she gripped into Emmett's arm with her fingers nails making him wince. Emmett's slip up was common knowledge at this point and Tanya's brining it up only served to hurt Rose's feeling. In his defense Rose had broken up with him and he was crushed and extremely drunk. He ended running out of the room crying with his pants around his ankles and Jasper and I had to carry him home while he cried about being dirty and catching herpes from the whore. Not exactly one of his proudest moments.

"Okay guys enough with the heavy! This is supposed to be a **_FUN DRINKING_** game. No ones having fun and no ones drinking!" Jasper shouted from the other side of the fire. I shot a glance over to poor Bella who sat horrified staring at the circus across from her.

"Okay fine. Since it's my turn again," Emmett said turning to face them, "Jasper have you ever asked my little sister to stick her finger up your ass during sex?"

His face immediately flushed red and everyone roared with laughter. He didn't even answer, just stuck out his hand and snatched the beer out of my hand and drank it down. At least he can say he took his shameful moment like a man. Once he was finished he crushed the can and tossed it at Emmett saying "Just so everyone knows…it was his idea."

"Don't feel bad guys…Edward likes that too," Tanya blurted out and I "accidently" knocked her backwards off the log.

"Oh sorry honey…did I make you fall?" I scowled ignoring everyone laughing around me. I couldn't even bring myself to look Bella but through everyone's laughter hers caught my attention and I peeked up to see her scratching her nose with her index finger in a very suggestive way with an eyebrow raised.

I frowned shaking my head at her and waited for someone to give me a reason to pay her back. I got my chance soon enough when after several rounds of embarrassing questions, learning more about my siblings than I'd ever wanted to know but not really caring because well…we did this all the time, and all of getting pretty wasted Rose asked her "Have you ever imagined little Edward here naked?

If it were at all possible Bella's already drunk red cheeks flushed a deeper red and her eyes jumped from my face to Tanya's face back to mine then to Rose's.

"Um….No?" she croaked at and Rose pushed another beer in her hand.

"Drink Swan…you're lying and you know it!" I wanted to laugh but when I saw how nervous she got I couldn't enjoy her moment of embarrassment. I was too embarrassed for her.

"No…no I'm not. I have a boyfriend…he's the only...I don't…" she stammered while her eyes jumped from my face to Tanya's.

"Just drink the beer Bella. It's not a big deal. If you won't want to drink the beer I'll have to give you a dare and it's only gonna get worse."

Bella's face twisted with a flash of drunken anger and she shot up looming over Emmett. "Is this the point of you stupid game Emmett? To humiliate people?"

"Not at all. The point of my game was to get you drunk…which you are." He reached up and grabbed her arms forcing her to sit between the two of us. "Mission accomplished! You've been initiated and it's quite clear you can hold your own with us now it's time to really celebrate. My little fucking sister's getting married tomorrow!"

Emmett skirted around the fire wrenching Alice up by arms and the two of them started dancing like idiots to no music. Bella's chest was heaving as she sat next to me digging her nails into the log and on instinct I moved closer to her. Our bodies just seemed to gravitate towards each other as she leaned into my side, her curves fitting comfortably against me. Jasper and Rose got up and started dancing too and after Bella calmed down she watched them laughing at the fact that they were all falling over each other.

"The only way this could get any weirder was if they were naked," she mumbled under her breath looking up at me from under her lashes. Our eyes locked for a moment and it was as if Tanya wasn't sitting on the other side of me. The firelight was dancing in her eyes making it seem like they were smoldering and her appley breath blew into my face with her every heavy exhale.

My fingers itched to stroke her cheeks…my lips burned to kiss her…and Tanya purposely bumped my arm sloshing beer all over me.

I was unpleasantly jerked back to reality when Tanya jumped up grabbing my arm and jerked me up. She threw her arms around my shoulders and forced her lips on mine before pulling me towards the rest of my family. She spun, putting her back to me and grinded into me over and over throwing her ass back into my stomach. With every thrust she either hit my full bladder or my already nauseated stomach and I didn't know whether to piss or puke on her.

At some point some one had pulled Bella into the mix and she was dancing with Alice and Jasper with him sandwiched in between the two of them grinning like he'd just one the lottery. Bella's eyes had me entranced even though I was switching back and forth between dancing with Rose and Tanya.

Forever the instigator Emmett shot over to the cooler and came back with another round of beers and then insisted on showing everyone how strong he was by throwing Alice and Bella over each of his shoulder spinning them.

"It doesn't count when you're pick up the two smallest people here Em!" Rose said bent over laughing so he insisted on picking up me and Jasper at the same time. This of course resulted in all three of us in heap on the ground laughing our asses off until we realized how quiet it had gotten.

"Tanya what the hell do you think you're doing?" Alice shrieked and my eyes immediately shot up searching for Bella. She was standing a few feet away from me, a horrified look frozen on her face. I followed her gaze just in time to see Alice smack something from Tanya's hand and the white powder fell like snow to the ground. I scrambled up from our dog pile and stumbled over to Tanya not able to believe what I was seeing.

She couldn't be that stupid.

But sure enough even in the moonlight I could see how dilated her pupils were…how glassy her gaze was.

"Get off me," she yelled jerking her hands away. "You guy seriously don't know how to party. You think playing little kiddy games like truth or dare is fun? What next are we gonna play a game of spin the bottle?"

Tanya leaned over laughing and stumbled backwards falling over. She grabbed a hold of Bella's arm dragging her down but I jerked Bella from the other side and pulled her into my arms.

"You're not pulling anyone else down with you!" I spat at her when suddenly Rose was screaming Emmett's name behind us. I spun around to see my brother's naked ass running off into the trees with Rose stumbling behind him laughing

"Got damnitt Emmett! Put your clothes back on! You want it to catch frost bite and fall off?" she called out disappearing with him. Alice, Jasper and I groaned in unison while they scrambled for his clothes.

"I forgot to mention before that Emmett is usually the one to end up naked… we kind of have to go find him." Bella nodded backing away from me but letting her hand trail along my arm until our fingertips were the last to touch.

"Get your ass off the floor and help us find Emmett," I spat at Tanya and took off in search of my idiot brother who wasn't as drunk as he was pretending to be. Emmett's naked sprint through tree was his typical way of dispelling our drunken tension.

Anger coursed through my veins as I jogged in search of him but as my want for Bella started to take over my thoughts I started making my way towards the cottage

"You're a whore you know that?"

I stopped short, and spun not bothering to hide the rage from my face as Tanya walked about behind me.

"So are you fucking her Edward? Is that why you haven't touched me in weeks?"

"No Tanya I haven't slept with her but God how I want to!" I shouted back at her. I only said it to be mean but that didn't make it any less true. "Anything would be better than letting you touch me! But it looks like you've been pretty busy yourself. So tell me…who is he? Who's the guy you're running around with…that you've been talking to all those times you're fucking blackberry is glued to your head?"

"Oh give it up Edward. Stop projecting your guilt onto me. I'm not sleeping with anyone else although no one would blame me if I did."

Tanya stepped right into my face and ran her long red fingernails across my cheek digging in my skin. I grabbed her wrist and jerked her hand away and she stumbled backwards almost falling again.

"Such a big man…now you're gonna hit me?"

"I'd never hit you and you know it although you have no idea how badly I wish I could be that guy for just one second. I'd beat your bloody brains in for bringing your filth into my parent's house! How could you be that stupid and to do that in front of my family…right in front of them. Do you have respect for anyone at all?"

She laughed at me which all fueled my anger even more. Her cackling made my ears want to bleed and I balled my fists up turning away from her in attempts to keep from hurting her.

"Don't you turn away from me you sorry bastard. You're pathetic you know that. You and you're pathetic little dreams of being a composer. News flash loser! Your music is god-awful and if you'd crawl out of mummies vag for a minute and step into the real world you'd see that."

My spine snapped and I spun around with every ounce of hatred in my body boiling beneath the surface of my skin.

"Tanya go back to the house. Now!" I said through gritted teeth. Oh how in that moment I wished she were a man.

"Aww…is little baby Edward going to cry…want me to go get your mummy for you?" she mocked and I felt hand flattening out.

"Go head and hit me. I want you too. It would be fitting for a sorry piece of shit like you. Face it Edward…you're just not good enough. If it weren't for me trying to talk some sense into you you'd amount to nothing so you should be thanking me."

"So this is how things are always going to be? You fuck up and then insult me because you have nothing more intelligent to say. How about I stoop to your level for just one second so you get my point…You're nothing but a coke-sniffing whore… now leave my sight before I do something I really regret."

I composed myself as quickly as the urge to strangle her flashed through me and turned my back. In the next 5 seconds all I heard were feet running after me and a body hitting the ground.

"Don't you dare touch him!" Bella screamed at Tanya who was lying stunned on the ground. "You're the pathetic one not him. How many after school specials does a person need to see before they get the point that drugs are bad for you? No wonder you're such a train wreck. You want to fight somebody then fight me because I'd love to give you the ass kicking you deserve."

By this time everyone had caught up with us. Tanya wrenched herself up from the ground and jumped in Bella's face but with her being drunk she was too slow and Bella pushed her back sending her flying into Alice's arms who had sprang forward to stop her from hitting Bella in first place.

"Get her out here please," was all I could say. I felt too drained and too drunk to deal with her anymore.

"Oh you may be mad at me right now but you'll forgive me in the morning. That's just how sorry you really are. Remember Edward...you promised," Tanya teased to my back as I slumped into the cottage.

I dragged my feet into my studio sinking onto the stool and leaned over with my face in my hands. My head was swimming and even though I was sitting still the room felt like it was spinning and through the underwater ears I heard tiny feet padding across the floor.

"Go away Alice," I mumbled and then shook when hands fished through my hair and pulled my head up.

"It's not Alice Edward. Open your eyes."

When I looked up Bella was staring down at me, her chocolate eyes brimming with concern.

"It is true?"

"Is what true? Bella I'm too drunk to play guessing games."

"Don't take that tone with me Edward," she said jerking my head back. I reached up grabbing her wrist and pulled her hand out of my hair. As much as I was relishing in her touch at the moment, the thought of her doing that again was enough to make me want to hurl. "Are you just going to forgive her?"

"For this one…no," I answered focusing my eyes on face. She was still all red and her eyes were darting back and forth in her head like she was trying to focus on my face but was seeing to many me to pick one out.

"You know I heard everything right. I was trying to find Emmett and realized I had no idea where I was going but then I saw you and followed you. I heard everything you said."

"I'm sorry you had to see that…but what's your point?"

"My point is she's a horror show Edward and as much as you say I deserve better than Jacob you deserve so much better than that….But I didn't hear you telling her that. You told her to go back to the house but you didn't tell her to pack her stuff and leave…so I think you are going to forgive her."

"I'm not going to forgive her."

"Bull shit! Prove it! March up there right now and tell her that you want better for yourself…that she's the one that's not good enough…not good enough for you!"

Bella took a step back were her fists balled up as she yelled at me. I knew she was right but if there was one thing I couldn't stand it was a hypocrite even when I was being one myself.

"I'll do that as soon as you tell _your Jacob_ that's its over between the two of you because, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't he supposed to be here now? I'm so interested to know where he is right now Bella…do you know?"

The moment I said it I wish I could take my words back but as I stood shouting my venom back at her something in her face told me she could and would take it. I had seen it on her face in while we were eating in the kitchen. The disappointment tinged with anger that she was hiding with her laughter and smile. But her eyes could not lie…at least to me they couldn't so as we stood screaming accusations at each other every once of frustration that was boiling in us for the people we were with was being unleashed on each other and the second Bella placed her hands on my chest to push me and I grabbed her wrists to stop her…something… happened. The tension that had built up in the room was electric setting us both on fire and it was as if we were suspended in time staring into each others eyes.

Like one magnet being pulled to another magnet our lips crushed together. Bella folded her arms against my chest pushing her pelvis towards me as my arms locked around her body holding her to me while our lips fought against each others.

My bottom lip was clenched between her teeth as I turned her around, kicking the piano stool out of the way and pushed her against the piano. Her ass hit the keys making them clamor horribly as I pushed against her and she clawed at my shirt. I pulled back letting my gaze fall to her face and she jerked her head up towards my mine, her darks eyes darker as her hands slid up my sides and beneath my shirt setting fire to my skin.

"Edward…I…want you…this…I want this," and her hands shot around to my back pulling my painful erection into her. I groaned moving up on my toes and then back down grinding against her and then raised my arms above my head so she could pull my shirt off. She pushed me back and stood before me, her lips kissing a trail from the bottom of my rib cage to my collar bone. I held her hips, my hands fitting perfectly in her curves and pulled her up so that our eyes met and in a very sobering moment, a moment that was so clear, so perfect I tangled my fingers in the back in hair and crushed our lips together knowing that she was the one. I had to have her.

Bella hands slid up my arms and locked around my neck and I spun us away from the piano as our kiss grew more hungry…more passionate…more violent. I could taste the anger on her lips but also the fierce desire and before I knew it her shirt was lying in scraps at our feet. Some how she ended up against a wall, my arms caging her as her sharp teeth bit in my shoulder. I cried out pressing my body against her but begged her for more…begged her to do it harder…I wanted...needed the hurt and she gave it digging her fingers into my back as I jerked at the buttons on her jeans.

We fell to the floor after that and in a frenzy of rushing hands and lips ending back in the middle of the floor. Somewhere in the back of my mind I was reminding myself of who I was with…that I had never seen her body…to look at her but the feel of her silken skin beneath my hands consumed me and I was too starved for her to pay attention.

"Edward…,"she panted out in a moment we both came up for air. "Tell me what you told her…say it…say it to me."

"Bella I want you…I want you more than I've ever wanted anything right now," I panted out gripping her thigh and pulling her beneath me.

"Show me…show me how much you want me," she whispered running her hands along the planes of my chest and making my skin burn.

Something snapped in my brain and I stared down at her while she was watching her hands on my chest. Her hand was knotted and twisted from my hands above her head, her skin red and welted from her blushing and my biting, but her face…her face had me in daze. How a person could look so primal and absolutely beautiful at the same time amazed me. I placed my hand gently on the side of her face and her eyes flickered up to mine, smiling at me and I leaned down kissing her softly for the first time that night trailing my hand slowly down her side feeling every shiver of her body.

"Edward," she whispered and pulled me in closer tightening her legs around me. I could feel her wet hot hot heat as my hand swept across her thighs. I linked my fingers underneath the waist of her tiny black knickers and pulled them down slowly while staring into her eyes waiting for her to stop me but she didn't. She wiggled her hips forcing them down and then tilted her chin up pressing her lips to mine murmured "touch me" into my mouth.

My fingers danced across her wet folds and she gasped and moaned into my mouth while I played her fast like my piano. Her breathy moans and pants became my new favorite song and when I let my fingers plunge into her she sighed out my name in away that made me absolutely love my name…never in all my life had I heard it said like.

"Bella…say it again…please…please say it again," I pleaded with her and she sighed it out again smiling up at me.

"_Edward." _

I attacked her lips against wanting to suck that words right from her mouth into me. She moved her body lower centering herself with me with one hand curled into my hair and the other grabbed the waistband of my boxers and pulled them down. Bella pulled her mouth away from my trailing her lips to my ear and whispered "Give me you…all of you…please."

Like a knife into melted strawberry butter I slipped into her. She gasped, rolling her head back and wrapped her body around me before crying out something incoherent. I on the other hand was seeing stars as her heat wrapped itself perfectly around me over as I thrust into her. Like a lock and its key we fit together swaying in a perfect rhythm as we moaned and clung to each other.

Every sound she made was so feminine and beautiful I found myself doing everything I could thing of to keep her going…keep her singing this love song to me…until she breaths became labored and she was literally vibrating beneath me…

"Oh God…Edward…I'm gonna I'm gonna…" she panted out and the grabbed my face forcing her lips to min kissing me as her walls clenched so tightly around me it pushed me over the edge. It was almost a moment to late that I pulled out of her body instantly missing it and rolled over exploding in my hand.

We lay side by side, our chests heaving and fingers locked together before rolling over at the same. For a second I just stared in her eyes before our lips softly pressed together.

"That was intense," she whispered resting her head on my shoulder.

"It was," I murmured into the top of her head.

"I'm exhausted."

"You and me both." But still I found the strength to scoop her off the floor and into the shower. We didn't exactly bathe…more like let the water fall over us enough that we weren't sticky with sweat anymore. I pulled my boxers back on and gave her my shirt and the two of us collapsed on the couch in the front room spooned under a blanket.

"Please tell me that all your little family get together's aren't like this?" she asked after a few moments. I thought she had fallen asleep.

"No, but that's because Tanya usually isn't around. Emmett hate's her. Always has so he uses every chance he can to show me why I shouldn't be with her."

"Well I could name off ten just by looking at her."

"I can only think of one," I whispered kissing her on the back of her neck.

"Oh yea…what's that?"

"Because I'd rather be with you."

I heard her gasp and felt her melt back into my arms. I could even hear the smile that spread across her face so I didn't need her to say anything. She turned her face back searching for my lips and I gave them to her. We kissed one last soft kiss before falling asleep.

* * *

**A/N Whew...that was intense...Want to see what happens next? Keep reading. **


	8. Glory Fades

G**lory Fades**

Upon arrival the guests had all stared.  
Dripping wet and clearly depressed,  
he'd headed straight for the stairs.  
No longer cool, but a boy in a stitch,  
unprepared for a life full of lies and failing relationships.  
**Sic Transit Gloria…Glory fades by Brand New**

**EPoV**

In my half-sleep half-awake state, I tried to piece together the events of the night before. Almost everything was a blur and something…somewhere in my head just hurt but I didn't know what.

All I did know; I was waking up on the couch in the cottage, half naked, with Bella curled around me, sound asleep, like a spider monkey.

As I gazed down at the muss of Bella's chestnut hair on my bare chest I didn't want to move. I didn't want to disturb the feeling of peace, hangover or not, that blanketed us. Unfortunately I found, when she shifted her weight over my stomach, I really had to pee.

"Bella," I whispered softly trying to shake her awake. "Bella, wake up."

She moaned softly, hugging me tighter, and moved her leg higher, hitching it over my waist. The warmth of her skin against mine sent my mind racing…counting clothing in my head…My boxers on me…my shirt on her…her panties hanging off the side of my piano…

The urge to pee disappeared, replaced by the need to have her again. I shifted my weight beneath her, my morning wood pressing into her stomach.

"Well, good morning," Bella whispered with a hint of a giggle in her voice. She slowly ran her hand down my side, leaving it to rest on my hip. Tilting her head up slowly, making sure her lips dragged across my chest, she looked up at me with sparkling eyes. I peered down at her, momentarily hooked by the come-hither look in eye. I rolled us over with minimal difficulty. She's seemed more than happy to feel the weight of me pressed against her.

"So…are we going to have one of those awkward "morning after" conversations?" Her tone was light and teasing, her fingertips delicate, as they moved along my ribcage.

"Only if you want to."

Bella locked her hands behind my back and smiled, her eyes darting to the space between us that I was unconsciously "reaching" close and shook her head. "No, I don't think we need to…unless there's something you want to say."

I shook my head slowly, leaning forward so that my lips would brush against hers. Her hands found my shoulders, moving up slowly until she held my face between her fingertips.

I raised my eyebrow to her, moving a hand slowly up her thigh. Her eyes seemed to jump as my fingers rose higher and higher, and then rolled completely when my thumb ran her across her breast. As my hands moved higher, hers were moving lower, over my back and into my boxers. Her hips rose from the couch grinding into me while she slowly pulled my boxers down over my ass. She opened her mouth to me, pulling my bottom lip between hers and squeezing my ass at the same time that …someone cleared their throat.

We froze –deer caught in headlights froze- with our lips mashed together.

"Damn it Jasper," I grumbled into Bella's mouth, "How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough to know you really need a tan. You have one pale ass!" The back of the couch protested under his weight when he sat on in and slapped me on the back. "So sorry to intrude on your little love nest but I'm getting married today and I'll be damned if I let your train wreck of a girlfriend…err ex-girlfriend…whatever, ruin mine and Alice's day."

I pulled back, shielding Bella's body so she could cover herself and get from underneath me. Her face was as red as Christmas when she got up and Jasper handed her a change of clothes.

"I hope you don't mind me going through your bag but I figured you'd need something to change into in case someone saw you sneaking back into the house."

"Um…no it's fine…thank you."

"Don't worry Bella, this isn't any of my business and I'm not going to say anything." She nodded, still red-faced, and wobbled on her shaky knees to the bathroom.

"It's not what you think," I pointlessly said when she was out of earshot.

"I'm sure it's _more_ than I think, but you two are the least of my worries today. Just do me a favor and try not to let Tanya ruin Alice's day, which you know is what will happen if she finds out. Can you do that for me Edward?"

I nodded, trying to ignore the guilt that was starting to nip at me. Maybe I hadn't chosen the best time to sleep with Bella, but then again, I hadn't exactly planned it. I didn't regret it one bit, but that didn't mean I was dumb enough to ignore the bad timing.

"Sure Jasper, you know I'd never let anything happen."

I kept that thought in my head the whole walk back to the house, during the awkward parting we had in the hall, all the way up until I reached my room and saw Tanya sprawled naked in the middle of my bed. The way she laid there, so relaxed and at peace, just set my blood boiling. Some vindictive little part of me wanted to scream what I had done right in her ear but that was just me being childish.

Instead I fisted Bella's underwear that I had shoved in my pocket and tried to creep into the bathroom. Finally have the chance to relieve myself, I relaxed but midstream felt Tanya come up behind me and wrap me in hug.

"The hell do you think you're doing?" I shook her off; dangerously close to peeing all over my bathroom floor.

"Oh, I see….you're still sore at me," she said laughing. I narrowed my eyes at her and wheeled away to turn on the shower without answering her. Tanya leaned in against the wall, one leg crossed in front of her, trying to appear bored but clearly aggravated at my ignoring her. That was always the one thing that really got under her skin.

"Oh come on Edward. You can't possible still be angry with me. We were all really drunk and yes I may have said some things I didn't mean but it's over now. You had your chance to sleep on it…now lets move on."

"It's not what you said, it was what you did. I don't give a shit what you _say_."

"But you care about what I do?" She raised her eyebrow at me, trying to trip me up but I already knew where she was going with this. Her need for validation was ridiculous sometimes.

"No…I don't give a shit what you_ do_ either, as long as it isn't in my parent's house and it isn't the night before my sisters wedding. You and I are done talking now. Leave me alone and I'll consider talking to you later."

I turned my back to her, my eyes narrowed in her direction in my reflection in the mirror, my hands impatiently holding the button on my jeans.

"Fine," she huffed and slammed the bathroom door.

I stepped into the shower, letting the hot water and steam sober me and was suddenly aware of the change in water pressure. That only happened when the shower in the guest bathroom was on at the same time as mine because they shared a pipeline. I pressed my hand to the wall, _knowing_, who was on the other side of that wall. I was too drunk the night before to really see her and would have bitten off someone's arm to see her now. I could almost imagine her standing there, letting the water fall over her body and roll over her curves in droplets.

I felt like I could still taste her on my lips and licked them slowly, straining to savor any of her that remained there. It was hard to concentrate on what I was doing. Hard to put soap on washcloth and washcloth to body because my brain was too busy working on recalling how it felt to have Bella's hands on me and my name being moaned from her mouth.

For a moment my knees buckled at the memory. I grabbed at the wall trying to hold myself up and shook my head. I needed to focus or I was never going get through the day. I'd end up throwing her over my shoulder and drag her into a closet somewhere if I wasn't careful.

The knock on my bathroom door pulled me from my thoughts. I wrapped a towel around my waist and stepped out just as Alice was stepping in with her hands over her eyes. Panic quickly washed through me, but then I sighed. I knew my sister. If she was angry she would have stormed in screaming her head off; balls out or not.

"I'm decent Alice. You can look."

She stepped up behind me, scrutinizing my reflection in the mirror. "Pluck your eye…Oh my God! Did that bitch do that to you?"

Alice grabbed my chin pulling my face towards her, her eyes frozen on the puffy scratches on my face.

"I'm going to kill her."

"Alice, don't get upset please. I'll put some aloe on it so the puffiness goes away and I'm sure you have something that will cover it up."

Alice's eyes widen and she staggered backwards. "Jesus Edward, you think I care about how it looks? She put her hands on you and I know this wasn't the first time."

"It's not a big deal Alice. It's just a few cat scratches. She's a child and doesn't know how to control her anger. Don't get upset of this…especially not today. This is _your_ day!" I smoothed my hand over her shoulder smiling at her. It seemed to work. She immediately perked back up, grinning like I'd just handed her a puppy.

"You're right! It is my day! Can you believe this? I'm marrying Jasper in a few hours. I've dreamed of this day for years and now that it's finally here, it's so much better than I imagined. He isn't sore about me making him get dressed in the cottage is he? I just wanted everything to be, you know, done right."

I shook my head. I found it best to let Alice ramble until she ran out of steam and seeing as though she hopped onto the counted and scooted back against the mirror, it was probably going to be a while. I handed her the tweezers and let her do her work.

We shot the breeze pleasantly for a few minutes while she plucked my eyebrows. I listened to most of what she was saying but couldn't get the smile on my face. My brain was still in the studio working between going over the notes to her song in my head and Bella…Bella…Bella.

"Something's different about you?" Alice grabbed my chin forcing me to look at her. Her skillfully waxed eyebrow was perfectly arched over her shadowed covered eye. It was the first time I'd really looked at her since she walked in and it made me smile. She really looked happy.

"Just happy for you is all," I said shrugging my shoulders. "It's going to be a great day," I mocked in my crappy Scottish accent. Alice laughed, pushing my shoulder and rolled her eyes.

"I know you're happy for me but…there's just something about you today…I like it. It's a good look for you…now speaking of good looks….I've got to go finished getting dressed. You've got about another hour before people start showing up."

The rest of the morning was as crazy as one could expect, complete with my crying mother corralling us around the house checking ties and dress hems, my father walking around with this bottom lip clenched between his teeth so hard I was afraid he'd bite it off – "What?" he'd said when we started making fun of him, "My only daughters getting married. Am I not allowed to be a little emotional? I'm giving my little girl away"-, and Bella and I trying our damnedest not to stare too hard or to long at each other.

It seemed like Alice was out for my blood with this one. She had chosen a dress in a particular shade of blue that made Bella's pale skin glow. Her eyes popped and shined and the flowers pinned into her hair made her look like every bit of the goddess I thought her to be, not to mention the low neckline showed the top of her soft breasts that I so badly wanted to press my lips against again.

Once the guests started to arrive I knew I had to put on my game face. Emmett and I took turns letting people in and showing them to their seats, so as I was showing Jasper's cousins –Peter and Charlotte- to theirs seats, Emmett was letting in Jacob- Bella's boyfriend.

I heard her tripping down the stairs and whipped my head around just in time to see her launch herself into his arms and kiss him almost as hard as she had done me this morning before we left the cottage. I felt like I'd been punched in the chest and stood there holding the back of Peter's chair for support with a dumbfounded look on my face.

"You alright there Edward?" Peter stood up quickly and grabbed my arm to keep me from falling over.

"Yea…too much to drink last night. Excuse me please."

"You don't look so good Edward, why don't you sit down a minute? Charlotte, honey, get Edward some water. He looks like he's about to pass out."

"I'm fine!" I insisted shaking him off me. "I just need some fresh air is all. Excuse me please."

It took me more time than I would have liked to weave through the chairs and into the kitchen to the solace of the back porch. I felt angry and confused- how could she seem so happy to see him after what we had done last night- but most of all I was burning with an unreasonable amount of jealousy. I stayed out there for as long as I could, breathing slowly…in…out….in…out…until I heard _his_ voice. It was all I could do not to jump from the back porch and taking off running through the woods. I despised Tanya's father. He was a narcissistic, egotistical, pretentious pain in my a-

"Edward! There you are my boy. Hiding from the wedding mania are we?" He nudged me with his elbow, already smelling three sheets to the wind and sounding it too.

"Yes sir, I suppose I am." I said through gritted teeth. Just being in his presence annoyed the hell out of me and looking at him only annoyed me more. All I could see was Tanya's more annoying habits in him, like the habit of talking to close to your face when they were drunk.

"Well don't hide for too long, I'm expecting you to make an honest girl out of my Tanya pretty soon." He leaned in close to me as he spoke and I wanted to cringe and die from the drops of spittle that were hitting my face. "I expect to see a ring on my little girls finger by the end of the year…once that happens we can talk about your position in the new office I'm opening in California."

"Of course Mr. Volt…but as I've explained to you and your lovely wife…I have no intentions of getting married until after I finish school. It wouldn't be fair to Tanya…for us to be newlyweds…while I'm so busy with medical school." Even thinking about it made my stomach turn but I made a promise to Jasper, not to let anything ruin his day and "The Volts" were known for making scenes when they were hearing something they didn't particularly like.

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me Aro? We're family Edward…have been for years."

He smiled in that creepy way he does that makes my skin crawl and clasped his hand over my shoulder. "Come now, Sulpicia and I want to get some pictures of you and our girl before this whole thing starts."

Aro led me forcibly back into the house, back into the hall where I could see from the corner of my eye Bella and her Jacob standing face to face in the midst of talking about who gives a shit. I didn't want to see them together. He was nothing like what I'd imagined and it was literally making my stomach turn.

Couldn't he at least be ugly for God's sake? Hadn't I been punished enough?

Bella felt me staring and gave me a tight lipped smile. I tried to smile back at her, tried to pretend not to be jealous, but I had no control over my face as it was being attacked by Sulpicia's cold red lips.

"Oh Edward! You look so handsome! Isn't he growing into such a fine young man Aro, darling? Why if I was only…I don't know…twenty years younger…oh to hell with it…you young boys love cougars these days don't you?" She laughed, sounding exactly like her daughter and pulled me in for a kiss again which I was gratefully saved from when my parents swept into my rescue.

"Aro…Sulpicia…we're so glad you could make it! We're about to get things started in a few minutes so if we could just get you in your seats. Edward has to get to his place.

It was mixed with relief and tension as I took my place at the bottom of the stairs. I felt my palms starting to sweat and wiped them nervously on my pants waiting for the music to start.

"What the hell is going on with you man?" Emmett whispered to me.

"Nothing, I'm just….you know…. Feeling some kind of way. Our sister is getting married today," I lied avoiding his gaze.

"Yea, I know but it's not really going to be any different is it. We've all been together like this for years. A stupid piece of paper isn't going to change anything is it?"

He was getting choked up. Alice and Emmett were very close…in a way that was different from their relationships from anyone else. He was afraid of losing that and I could see it written all over his face.

"No…no I don't think so Em. If anything, I think it will only strengthen our bonds." I smiled reassuringly at him and then watched him literally hold his breath. The music had started and Rosalie had started her slow procession down the stairs. I'll admit she looked radiant…so much so that Emmett literally put his fist in his mouth and whined over it. I had to nudge him to get him to hand her the bouquet of flowers and as he took her hand I could see the way he was tangling their fingers together.

I had the feeling they were going to disappear for a few the first chance they got but couldn't dwell on it to long. Bella's tiny feet appeared at the top of the stairs followed by her slender legs, her curves that my hands were itching to touch again, and then her face. She wore the same tight-lipped smile, only slightly softened, as her eyes swept across the room before finally settling on mine. I wanted to be mad at her, wanted to be cold and standoffish, but something in her face when she looked at me stopped me.

She reached for my hand before she was supposed to and visibly relaxed when she linked her arm with mine. I felt jealousy dissolving for the moment. I had her on my arms. That was all that mattered. Not Tanya's cold glare from across the room, not Jasper's sly grin as he eyed us, not even the way my mother was staring with her mouths agape at us. Just Bella…on my arm…walking down the aisle.

We took our places at the altar and it was only when the wedding march began that I ripped my eyes away from her. Alice and my father appeared at the top of the stairs and she really was a vision of beauty and perfection. They walked slowly down the aisle clutching each other, both of their chests heaving, to the front where my father placed her small hand in Jasper's.

The two embraced each other and the ceremony proceeded beautifully through their tear-soaked vows and a first kiss so passionate the officiant actually had to clear his throat to pull them apart into the reception.

I waited until Emmett gave me the cue during the reception before making my way over to the piano. Tanya followed close behind me sitting on the bench beside me.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I mumbled harshly to her. "You can not sit here while I'm playing. You're going to get in my way."

"Would it kill you to let me at least pretend to support you? My sitting here or not isn't going to make this any worse than it already is. My father thinks something wrong between us…I'm trying to show him we're fine. Now smile!"

I couldn't smile. I couldn't even get my brain to work for a moment because my eyes were focused on Bella across the room and she was smiling at her Jacob in a way that made me glad I didn't have super strength because my piano would have been a pile of dust at my feet. I just laid my fingers on the keys and let the music play. I tried to keep my eyes focused on Alice and Jasper in the middle of the room but the kept wandering back to her. His arms were wrapped around her waist and even from where I sat I could see him stroking her stomach, nuzzling his head in her waist as she combed her fingers through his hair. When he pulled her down for a kiss I had to close my eyes and kept them closed until the song was finished.

The rest of the reception passed without much incident. There was a lot of dancing, a hell of a lot drinking, though how any of the six of us could bare was beyond me, and one very difficult hour where we tried very hard to be sober enough not to ruin the wedding photos. By the end of the night Emmett and Rose were passed out in the corner in chair, my parents had "disappeared" upstairs, and Alice and Jasper had said to hell with everything and left early for their honeymoon. This left me dragging around a drunken Tanya who was making a show of hanging onto me. I avoided Bella like the black plague, still unable to comprehend just what in the hell she was up to. With the last of the guests gone I hobbled my way, exhausted and ready to collapse, up the stairs only to find Bella standing in the middle of the guest room staring at her hands.

Part of me wanted to keep it moving, but when I saw the look on her face, I was compelled to make sure she was okay.

"Bella? Are you alright?"

She looked up at me, her eyes full of tears, and shook. Literally shook.

"Edward, I'm so sorry."

She ran at me, trying to run past me but I grabbed her and pulled her into my arms. I buried my face in the top of her head and she reluctantly wrapped her arms around me, pressing into me before turning her face towards me. I kissed her softly, moving slowly in case she wanted to pull away but she leaned into my kiss. The moment was exactly that. A moment.

Bella slipped from my grasp and ran from the room. Moments later I heard the rumble of her truck outside as it pealed, or crawled that is, out of the garage. I wanted to scream. I wanted to punch something, and spit and curse and do all the things that people do when they're angry. Instead I just pinched the bridge of my nose and exhaled, regaining my composure deciding to hell with it all.

I was tired of women and their games. Now that the wedding was a success and over, I could toss Tanya's sorry ass to the wind. But that would wait until morning. As soon as my head hit the pillow I fell fast asleep. The past 24 hours of my life might as well not have happened at the point. Had I of known then that it was only the beginning…I maybe would have slept a little longer.


End file.
